by Rose P
That was evil :-]
I really bought into that story. I was there and I could see her. The writing was exquisite. I just wish it had been longer and included alot more activity. Can hardly wait for chapter 2.
Excellent beginning.. well written and looking forward to the rest of the tale
"Remove your shoes. Sit on the floor. Cross your legs and remove them"
Technically you she is being asked to remove her legs, not her shoes. You might want to change that part.
other than that it was a great introduction!
Certainly left me wanting in more ways than one