I like the premise and context of this story; there are many hot possibilities. You are also a good writer.
My only issue (or disappointment) is that it is too short and undeveloped. This really needs another page or two, even if it is going to receive subsequent chapters.
Thank you for your comments. You are right about it needing more development. Although it was meant as continuation of a previous story, it needs more substance and character depth in this middle section to takes things as far as they should/could go! Thanks again for reading and commenting.
English
Liked it, but . . .
I like the premise and context of this story; there are many hot possibilities. You are also a good writer.
My only issue (or disappointment) is that it is too short and undeveloped. This really needs another page or two, even if it is going to receive subsequent chapters.
Great feedback
Thank you for your comments. You are right about it needing more development. Although it was meant as continuation of a previous story, it needs more substance and character depth in this middle section to takes things as far as they should/could go! Thanks again for reading and commenting.
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