Anime Convention Harem Ch. 07

Awesome

Loved the chapter, glad to see you're still alive and writing :P

Wow

With how fast the story was updating until now I had figured you had already had it written up in its entirety. Then, when you stopped, I figured that was the last we had seen of this story, like so many others before it. And now you tell me that you spent that time refining it? This is an amazing chapter that blends plot development, character development, and erotica seamlessly. And you're still not happy with it? This is the mark of a true artist. I hope that isn't cheesy to say.

If all the stories here were of this quality, we would none of us be wanting for reading material, ever. Never stop writing.

Welcome back

As another had mentioned here, I was afraid that you had disappeared like so many others. I'm glad to see that you haven't. I really love your character development of Kelly, showing a caring side that I was uncertain that she had. I'm really looking forward to where you are going with this.

Welcome back

I had believed this story to be dead, but I'm happy to see it return. I hope the next chapter wait isn't as long and I'm liking where to are taking the characters. I also like the longer length and hope that the next chapter or two will actually have sex in it rather than a daydream of sex at the end.

YAY!

Well, you're back. from outer space and i find you back with that look on your face. ahem sorry, glad for another chapter. haven't read it yet but i'm going to. slowly, i devoured the other six chapters as fast as you put them out.

WB

Welcome Back! I think you've done a great job, sad to hear it's been such a rough time for you getting this together. I definitely look froward to more though. :)

Damn

this story is truly awesome, your character devlopment for all the girls is really cool, I love how they all have their unique personalities, I hope Chloe ends up alone sigh she doesn't deserve anything well once again awesome story dude

Great New Chapter

Welcome back. I have to say, I'm glad to see a new chapter from you, especially one with a little more length. That said, I'm not sure why you would agonize over this chapter. We've got Stephanie continuing her characterization of the shy introvert unsure of what to do, and Kelly has really stepped up. While I could see a bunch of rewrites in the flash of desire in Kelly's mind as you struggled for the perfect tone, overall the chapter pulls them together in way that feels natural and along the expected set-up previous chapters have given us. I especially love the imagery of Kelly becoming Stephanie's Trainer in the bizarre Monster Battler flirting/role-play going on. I eagerly await what comes next.

Thank you everyone for your support!

I am not giving up or dropping this project - if it seems like I've disappeared it's because I'm struggling or caught somewhere. I went through correspondence with five different proofreaders before I could find one, Ante_Matter, who would actually read the chapter.

The focus was for our initial harem cast to have their strengths and weaknesses complement each other in ways that help them reach Brian. Kelly's pride made her overlook and miss out on opportunities, while Stephanie's fear rendered her unable to reach out to Brian on her own.

As Stephanie's chapters had her growing more confident and exploring herself, I wanted Kelly to re-evaluate her preconceptions about people and begin actually connecting with them. I also wanted to establish differences in perspectives; while Stephanie fantasizes in a naive but romantic way, Kelly does so in an impersonal, almost pornographic fashion.

I struggled making the 'feel' of Kelly's dialogue and thoughts distinct from Emily, and most of all I struggled to organize and edit many, many, MANY different potential conversations I had written between K and S into one that flows somewhat naturally into my individual objective points without feeling too much like I was railroading them.

After that it was very hard adding things that I was reluctant to - and removing things I really wanted to keep, in order to preserve a balance between the trifecta of charming, realistic, and sexy that I want for the overall story.

tldr; An author overthought things for months and for better or worse is glad to have this chapter finally posted.

No Complaints

It was a good chapter with excellent character development and pacing. Take as much time as needed to continue this level of craft.

Wow

Just finished reading this chapter, I am really enjoying where you are taking the story, I definitely would not say it's incoherent at all. Truly enjoying it so far and I am so looking forward to the next chapter. I must admit I really like the fact that you have made this chapter longer, it seems to give you the chance to expand on what is happening giving more space for detailing. Please continue your hard and great work. Thank you

Love this story

Cannot get enough of this story. The characters are brought to life skillfully and the fantasies are downright amazing. The only problem is having to wait till the next chapter! Keep going! This is one of the best written mc stories on this site. Can't praise your work enough.

Amazing

I spend a lot of my time reading both professional and non-pro works. This could easily be pro at the level it is now. Kelly is hot as hell and her working on Stephanie is already getting me going.

One fantastic story

Please keep it up. As someone that doubts his own work, I know how it can cripple your thought process. Just keep at it. Really enjoy this story.

I am really impressed

normally I read this stuff just for the sex.
I think you did a great job building the characters and I want to see them go further not just for the orgasms but to see who ends up with who. Emily, Stephanie, Kelly and Brian are great and I want to see how their emotions play out, not just the physical stuff which I can predict. I think you did extremely well with their inner dialogue and all your characters are very involving. I wish I could quote anime to someone and have them understand the context. GOOD JOB. I hope you keep writing and someone should pay you for it. Even if their is no sex I want to know what happens with these characters.

Best so far

Best chapter so far. Very intricate but not cumbersome.

Eagerly awaiting more!!

I love the character development. The pace is good as well. I am greatly looking forward to see where you take the budding harem next!

Great story

I hope you figure out what you need to keep this story going. I've really enjoyed reading it and was a a little sad that I finished it all in two days. It is the best story I've read in a while, nice interactions with the characters and the flow of it to.

Great to see you back!

I'm really enjoying this story, can't wait to read more. Thanks for your work! *****

wow

I love reading your work. Looking forward to the next chapter.

10/10

I've loved this story so far, it has been amazing character development wise, the plot is great, I can't wait till the next chapter!!!! ^~^

Any more of this comin out soon?? Very clever story!!

Perfect, don't change a thing!

I love it. The characters. The style. The slow build up. It's a very enjoyable and appealing story and I hope that you are able to continue it far into the future and soon! Keep up the fantastic work! And remember, we are always our worst critics.

Gahhh...dude!

Seriously?! I'm waiting on pins and needles for the next chapter! Hope you haven't given up on this! You have done an outstanding job so far. Please continue.

Definitely one of the best group of stories I've read on here in ages. I hope you find the time to do another chapter at some point

Thank you for your support!

The next section is coming along, and I've given myself a deadline of BEFORE December for it. The month of December for me this year is so busy that I may not have time to get to my computer at all, let alone work on writing, so that makes it my obvious deadline. This coming section be the 'Friday finale' and wrap up this night for these characters / this portion of the story, either as one much longer chapter or possibly split into two chapters that you'd get back-to-back.

I found an amazing proofreader (or rather, an amazing proofreader found me) who's both exhaustive and patient, so a lot of early sections in this chapter I was struggling with and unsure of how to fix have been resolved.

The last hitch (besides me simply running out of free weekends where I have time to write) is.. whether or not I should head-hop between different character perspectives for this finale portion. On the one hand I want to be fairly consistent and keep things like I have in past chapters, but on the other hand, there will be a LOT going on and I feel like readers may feel unsatisfied if they're limited to a single perspective for it.

Let me know what you think!

+

1st, Really glad to see an update from you, and to see that you're getting close to submitting more!

Now then: you really do have a dilemma there. It's been a while since I read any of this, but I think seeing things through the characters' perspectives is what makes "Anime Convention Harem" shine. So with that in mind (ba-dum tss), I would recommend Either shifting from perspective to perspective as you're contemplating (with clear, impossible-to-miss cutoffs between shifts) OR just writing the same scene(s) multiple times for each different perspective.

The latter is likely to be a tad messy, so if you have a compelling idea / reason for doing particular scenes from particular perspectives, then I'd lean towards that.

Oh My God

This is AWESOME. I am a big fan of this smutty stories AND shy timid girl - experienced confident girl pairing. And your writing skill. I myself is a writer who like to throw erotic bits here and there, and i can tell, your skill is next level.
Thank you so much for the experience. I hope you would continue it soon.

Good stuff. Good stuff.

Most entertaining truth or dare game I have ever read.
And the whole story is...I don't even know how to describe it...the best kind of cheesy anime refrences and tropes done right, while being self aware about it at the same time?
The only thing that saddens me ist that there is not more of it, and that I probably won't get to read the next chapter for months.

2 wide grins + 3 hard ones = 5/5