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English
lack of editing....
drops to 4 stars.
Learn about bra sizes and the body. Not many petite cheer leaders have a C, let alone all the DDs you have... bouncing around.
Double C's? Double B's???
Last, watch for lines like "I screamed as I shot seaman right out of my cock." Where else is he gonna shoot it from? His little finger? His nose?
I do love the concept! Keep it up!
Response to "lack of editing" comment from Lefric
Lefric, I just wanted to say thank you for the constructive criticism and feedback.
I do appreciate it.
You do make some valid points. I suppose I will need to focus
more on editing and ensuring that my stories aren't unrealistic to the point that
they take the reader out of the experience.
I will definitely focus on making improvements and enhancing the quality of work in my future stories.
That being said, I'm really glad that you loved the concept for this series.
Feel free to read the other stories in this series and any other erotic
stories that I have posted on this site. Constructive feedback is always welcomed and appreciated.
*
Where is Chapter 8?
Response to "*" comment
I have yet to write and publish a potential Chapter 8 for this series.
Glad to hear that you enjoyed this chapter and are enjoying this series so far.
Hopefully, I'll have the time and the motivation to extend this series
a bit more and give it an 8th chapter.
In the meantime, feel free to read the rest of the stories on my page
and provide feedback on those as well.
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