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Riding The Slipstream

bybluerains©
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by Anonymous

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by Lauren Hynde04/04/04

I like it, but...

I think you should focus more on one single, powerful image, like the slipstream and all it represents. Otherwise the words, beautiful as they are, start to lose meaning.

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by JCSTREET05/12/04

Lose the comma after "dreams"

sounds silly . . . but you'd get an extra 10 miles to the gallon

Carl

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