All Comments on 'Fooling Around Andrew and Kiars'

by Norwayadventure

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AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago
Content is good, work on mechanics

There is a typo in the title! I think you're on a good track here but please choose a tense (present progressive, like "I slide on my thong, I answer the phone" or past tense like "I slid on my thong, I answered the phone"). It makes reading much more enjoyable :)

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