And how can someones life duck? Probably mean suck?
by
Anonymous06/21/16
Edit, edit, edit!!!!
Your name is Andy, and you are her favorite niece. Later, you got a hard-on. So, you're what, a she-male?
"The guys took and their ducks and started fapping."
Even for a first story, the writing was deplorable. If you really are in college, you should drop out. You're wasting your time.
by
Anonymous06/21/16
Well...
That just ducked! *
by
Anonymous06/21/16
slutty aunt
Something tells me English is not your first language.
"...(D)oing my college. Since my college was far away from my home I stayed in the hostl for the first year of my education."
One goes to college for education. "The first year of my education" is redundant, repetitive, and repeats itself. These are extra words that mean nothing and detract from your tale.
The rest is downhill.
Throw the dictionary away and just write.
by
Anonymous06/21/16
Spell check
The story was poorly written. You should have had someone edit it for spelling and content...very poorly written
by
Anonymous06/21/16
Niece is a chick...
Wow... What an utter waste of time. Your spelling is wrong, grammar is horrible, and you can't keep shit straight.
Nieces have tits and pussies, not hard ons.
Nephews have hardons.
Buck naked = nude.... NO CLOTHES
You need a spell checker, editor, and to stop beating off while writing your poorly throughout stories.
by
Anonymous06/22/16
Write in your native language
You should have written this in Gujarati or Hindi or whatever your native language is, because it sure isn't English. To quote yourself, this ducked!
I've got a serious problem with this story, you claimed to be a niece, but the tags say nephew, you place this in incest, but there's no hint of incest at all.
You need to hire someone who fully understands English.
English
Lots of spelling errors.
Is the MC a male or female?
And how can someones life duck? Probably mean suck?
Edit, edit, edit!!!!
Your name is Andy, and you are her favorite niece. Later, you got a hard-on. So, you're what, a she-male?
"The guys took and their ducks and started fapping."
Even for a first story, the writing was deplorable. If you really are in college, you should drop out. You're wasting your time.
Well...
That just ducked! *
slutty aunt
Something tells me English is not your first language.
"...(D)oing my college. Since my college was far away from my home I stayed in the hostl for the first year of my education."
One goes to college for education. "The first year of my education" is redundant, repetitive, and repeats itself. These are extra words that mean nothing and detract from your tale.
The rest is downhill.
Throw the dictionary away and just write.
Spell check
The story was poorly written. You should have had someone edit it for spelling and content...very poorly written
Niece is a chick...
Wow... What an utter waste of time. Your spelling is wrong, grammar is horrible, and you can't keep shit straight.
Nieces have tits and pussies, not hard ons.
Nephews have hardons.
Buck naked = nude.... NO CLOTHES
You need a spell checker, editor, and to stop beating off while writing your poorly throughout stories.
Write in your native language
You should have written this in Gujarati or Hindi or whatever your native language is, because it sure isn't English. To quote yourself, this ducked!
...
I've got a serious problem with this story, you claimed to be a niece, but the tags say nephew, you place this in incest, but there's no hint of incest at all.
You need to hire someone who fully understands English.
Sorry.
Awful!
Awful!
Awful!
Awful!
Awful!
Awful!
Awful!
Awful!
A wful!
Awful!
Really, really awful.
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