All Comments on 'Elise and My Roommates Ch. 03'

seriously are you making him a wimp? another cucky story ?

mark my words this losers gf is gonna fuck em all .

let kevin beat some of them up let him hit elise jezus no go guy would just standby this crap hope you change it dude otherwise its gonna end up like all the other stupid cuck stories

Bring in some conflict, have her caught outright lying to him to cover up what she's doing, she's clearly manipulating him now, knowing exactly what she's doing. We can all see it coming.

It's a damn good story, but she's moved beyond innocent naievity into manipulation now. So reflect that, have her caught out straight up bullshitting. But please, I implore you avoid the cuckold trap of him being ok with it in the end, it's a tired cliche. He can be turned on by it sure, but find a better ending than that, this is a fantastic story and it deserves that, the boyfriends a bit of an idiot, but doesn't come across as a complete dickhead who deserves it.

Only other bit of advice I could possibly give is wrap it up by chapter 5. You've peaked your storyline here. One more of her sneaking around, with him finally wising up right at the end maybe of chapter 4. Perhaps have a dramatic consequence: Her getting pregnant all of a sudden and not being able to explain how? Just spitballing ideas, but the only real one is: You have a fantastic 10/10 story so far, don't ruin it by falling into a common trope or going on too long, make your star burn bright and fast rather than burn too long and fade out :)

Thanks for the feedback, I always appreciate it. I'm on vacation at the moment and not writing but if there's another chapter, number 4 will be the last for this particular story. With that said, there could always be future Elise stories if I think up a good idea.

I'm far from a professional writer, but I'm trying to write the Elise story in a fun, vague way, it's up to you to decide how much happened. If you think Elise is fucking everyone, that's up to you. If you think she didn't fuck or blow Jeff, that's up to you too.

I'm just happy you took the time to read it. Just trying to write the type of story I enjoy reading.

I'm dying for details on that night in the room. But I hope you would mellow down on the 4th story and wont go full blast group sex. Looking forward to reading more of Elise. Can't wait for the next one!

Love the progression, can't wait for the next part!

I liked this chapter but not as much as the others. I look forward to reading the conclusion. I'm glad you aren't trying to stretch it out for too long. I do however hope you continue the naive girlfriend tricked by boyfriend's friends type of stories. You are one of the best on here with that type of style. And those style of stories are really hot!!! Look forward to reading more for you in the future.

I've enjoyed the series but this was a little less innocent and left too much to the imagination. I hope the last one goes all out making Kevin an humiliated cuck and Elise craving huge cocks or can at least recapture the naivety of the first two in the series.

Cmon hurryyyyyyyy!

I'm loving this story so much. Thank you for writing it! I agree with all of the comments saying its one of the best I've read in a long while.

Really enjoying what you are offering. I can see these two and others like them ha ing all kinds of adventures. I love how she's slowly dragging him down the line.

Great story I can't figure out if she is lying or or just a dumb innocent girl. Fun to read you could definitely keep ther hijinks going for a wile as Kevin said the sex is incredible and he would over look almost anything to be with her.

I'd love to see this one from Elise's POV, just to see what she meant be "just acting" for that blowjob and sex...

I hope you write more if these! You can see alot of us enjoy your stories.

Oh, just read the re-write. By Sara's comments with Kevin, he and Elise are truly a cuckold/hotwife.

Another great, well written chapter. I'm not buying the naive role of Elise anymore but that's just me and how I'm interpreting your story. As you mentioned in your earlier comment it's up to the reader to decide what did or didn't happen. Let's see where chapter 4 leaves me.

Awesome story, tbh it's just what I'm looking for. Elise loves Kevin truly and she does a few naughty exhibition too but, she doesn't sex, that's what makes this so interesting. Also I love the part where Elise only fucks Kevin and tease others.

Disappointed to see Shawn & Matt get away with dictating the truth or dare game and also making Sara and Scott stay knowing well that Kevin would be left all alone, it would have been great if Elise had shown some hate towards them later and also no more nude pics to em. Hahaha....

I've read most of your stories and it's really amazing, tbh there's one thing I didn't like, Ryan ass fucking her and that was also her first time. That was cheating, I don't consider others cheating but letting him stick his shaft nside her ass was like a let down imo. Nevertheless the story is AWESOME.... 5 stars ✨.

As long ass Elise doesn't fuck others and just continue to tease this will be awesome, her love to Kevin should remain true and they should marry and elise getting pregnant and finally she stops all of this slutty exhibitions and live happily with Kevin and her children.

So this story isn't working for me at all, and has actually been kinda actively frustrating to read, but I'm still reading because I'm curious why this works for the author and the people enjoying it.

First and foremost, there's multiple characters who are just idiots- that's not really a criticism, because I'm assuming that's intentional. Perhaps people who grew up around a super hot but slow girl develop a fetish for that? It's not something I can personally relate to, but I'd be interested to hear why it works for others.

I tend to think of cheating stories as falling into either positive vibe stories (everyone involved is okay with it) or negative vibe stories, with my personal preference being the latter. This one seems like the latter (there is clear, knowing deception by virtually every character), but with characters trying to pretend its the former. The problem is, the pretending is completely unbelievable to me personally, so when the POV character goes along with it I lose immersion and instead I'm sitting there going 'oh come on, no one is that dumb.' Willing suspension of disbelief is fine line- once you lose it, it's very very hard to get it back.

The problem isn't that idiots don't exist in real life, it's that they don't tend to make good characters. People don't tend to think of themselves as idiots, so when the characters are continuously dumb, it makes it harder to relate to them, harder to be invested in them. I end up just not caring about these characters and their outcomes.

I'm very confused and I'm not even sure what I'm trying to ask here, but I guess mainly what I want to know is who is this working for and why?

Hey, ignore my previous comment. Being young and autistic I had yet to really adjust my suspension of disbelief for most erotica. Apologies for the overly negative tone I used at the time.

This is a fun series, thanks for your work on it.

Hey WordSculptor, respect!