All Comments on 'Steppin' on Toe's'

by My Erotic Tail

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  • 4 Comments
WickedEveWickedEvealmost 20 years ago
I like the content

You have a down-home kind of wisdom/humor going on in this poem.

But... I have to say this one thing. Spank me if you must, but I'm going to say it. The rhythm is off a bit in some spots and it's such an easy fix.

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You have:

"The world's gotten crowded and there's a lot more feet.

Just try hard to be kind and sweet."

You could try:

World's gotten crowded; there's a lot more feet,

so try your hardest to be kind and sweet.

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"If you step on a toe look them square in the eyes,

Then kindly apologize."

How about:

If you step on a toe, look them square in the eyes,

then by all means kindly apologize.

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Remember: just suggestions that may or may not work for you.

echoes_sechoes_salmost 20 years ago
All too true

nice context, and Eve is right...she loves to be spanked :devil:

Joseki KoJoseki Koalmost 20 years ago
Snicker

That was pretty funny thanks:-]

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 20 years ago
Very funny

I liked this little poem for the most part, but since this is a short image it makes the cliches stand out. Maybe you used them as part of the fun for the write?

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