All Comments on 'Red Riding Hood'

by Fredoberto

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  • 82 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
Was there NO Confrontation

Why wasn't there ANY commentary regarding the cause and eventual Divorce discussed with His Wife..

Almost a very good story - Keep Trying

Urbanbreaker13Urbanbreaker13over 7 years ago
Kind of nice

Except from the fact that you named the 3 islands after the 3 musketeeers it was a nice read. Loved the theme and the setting. It was a little hard to get into a rythm with all the pauses and asterisks but it was interesting. Maybe a little bit more sex next time? 3*

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
Sure go ahead

and divorce her, but tell her why and at least let us know that everyone knows why in the family.. revenge is no good unless somebody knows and thats all you got. the story ended to quickly, did you get tired of writing it?

tazz317tazz317over 7 years ago
THE GIFT BEARING SAGA CONTINUES

with a Greek Tragedy. TK U MLJ LV NV

erk0630erk0630over 7 years ago
and?

A long happy marriage, and no explanation? I'm sure he got one, but what about us?

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
Eight Lines that Were Missed Out

A few days after we got home I spoke to Susie

"I think it's time for us to get divorced."

She showed no emotion.

"Yes, I think that would be best."

There was a long silence , then she said,

"It's about Wolfgang isn't it."

"Chasing other men's sheep is a dangerous occupation for wolves."

She nodded and said no more.

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
clever

Nicely done with a clever denouement. Enjoyed it.

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
Beware Englishmen bearing goats

Interesting setting. Well told story. Needs sex to be rated higher.

ju8streadingju8streadingover 7 years ago

would like a sequel to find out what happened to the wife, please

Dirty_SteveDirty_Steveover 7 years ago
Brilliant story telling

But I really think you just dropped the story. You stepped from questioning the husbands love of his wife to hooking up with another and waiting for divorce in two paragraphs. It was way to abrupt ...especially since you spent time filling in their past and the passion of their relationship so well. It all fit perfect until you ended without so much as a comment of them going their separate ways.

I agree with the comment about adding a chapter to fill in the wife. What a loss she suffered. NOT the donkey dick but she will wake up and see the absence of her marriage and that is the real tragedy of this story. The husband was justified in his thoughts and actions (murder is a little old school and divorce understandable) but that really wasn't the story. You set it up....a perfect story about a relationship...it felt real but it missed the actual moment.

Thanks for sharing your story. Loved the symbolism...

SelqSelqover 7 years ago
Enjoyed the story.

Thank you for writing.

@anon: if you actually read a story, your score doesn't get removed during the sweeps, even if it's a one. Only scores that are given without the possibility of the rater having read the story are removed, whether 1 star or 5 stars or somewhere in between.

The fact that you are ranting about this, over many stories' comment sections, tells me that you are one of the people that the sweeps are meant for.

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
Great Job

# 5

northstanderrhinonorthstanderrhinoover 7 years ago
Lacked drama!

Whilst I enjoyed reading the story, I think the author rather glossed over the aftermath of the wife's affair, there was no interaction between man and wife, no drama, anger or any hint of recrimination, in fact the ending seemed quite rushed.

There should have been some confrontation between them to bring life to the story.

sdc97230sdc97230over 7 years ago
Jimmy really couldn't confront Susie about her cheating

Eleni is the only person who knows that Jimmy knew Susie was cheating on him and didn't like it. Everyone else in the village thought he knew and was ok with it, and of course Susie thought he didn't know at all. So the authorities had no reason to suspect he might have had a reason to harm Wolfgang. It was in his best interest for Susie to continue to believe he was in the dark, and for their marriage to fall apart later for some other reason - or even for her to think he was dumping her because he fell for Eleni.

LickideesplitLickideesplitover 7 years ago
Very Good Story ... but ...

Nicely crafted, but agree with several about the ending! LW does not (IMHO) involve JUST an adventurous spouse, but also the impact on and consequences to the marital relationship. Put a big check on adveywife, a much smaller one on consequences, but a shit stain on impact.

5* nonetheless

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
Great story ruined by a lousy ending........

should have been a 5 but gave it a 2 for the lousy ending

kimi1990kimi1990over 7 years ago
Noooo! Not the goat!

You killed the goat! Poor little goatie. Why did he deserve to die? This was not a BTB story, it was a BTG story. You burnt the goat! Maybe we could eat him in a gyro with some tzatziki and Greek spices. No sense in letting his sacrifice be in vain.

If you say we can eat him, I'll give you four stars. Three, otherwise.

TheKrrakTheKrrakover 7 years ago
Not bad but

I have to agree that there should have been some kind of confrontation with Susie. Leaving that out of the story seemed to lessen it somehow. But extra marks for not only killing the swine, but using a goat as an alibi.

4/5

foolscapfoolscapover 7 years ago
mmmmmmmmmmmm tzatziki

is there anything it can't do? (with apologies to Matt Groening)

FredobertoFredobertoover 7 years agoAuthor
Getting my goat

Sorry about the goat. Giros, tsatsiki and a couple of cold Mythos beers would go well with it. Comments are welcome, except the weird stuff.

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
Adlutery is an opportunity to rebuild a failed marriage, or start a new one. Its all a matter of options.

Suzie lost her husband for one simple reason, she unknowingly released him from his marriage vows when a better woman was in the offing. Odds are good Suzie merely succumbed to awesome sex, and would have quickly forgotten Wolfgang once they returned from Greece. Unfortunately for her, the husband she cast aside for a few days was quickly picked up by a better woman. I hope his new relationship with Eleni is permanent.

The flaw in this story is the lack of drama as Susie learns that her marriage is over. How did all that come about? Since that is an obvious and compelling question, one wonders if the author lacked the wit or the interest to fill in that final part of the puzzle. Too bad, as otherwise it would have been a top notch story. As is its only mediocre.

But thanks for the effort.

killerwhale681killerwhale681over 7 years ago
For the want of a horny goat!

That's a novel plot device......hmmmmm.....I helped raise goats when I was younger.....yep, they want to tussle with ya......yeah, they piss on themselves as well. We had a buck that weighed around 100 lbs or so. That was interesting. Thing was, the more they fought, the hornier they got.

driv2u2driv2u2over 7 years ago
More

Ended to quickly , no confrontation , was going well except the end .

kimi1990kimi1990over 7 years ago
Yes, Foolscap,

But God often gives tzatziki, and gyros, to toothless people. Was that weird? I don't think it was weird. I've heard that weird people often don't think they're weird. Just think, I could have said, "What really, is cheating? Is it when the penis goes in the vagina?" Or, "Same old paint by the numbers." Or, "fag cuck shit." Now that would have been weird. Okay, I gave you the four.

sbrooks103xsbrooks103xover 7 years ago
Too Much Build-up

It took over a page and a half of a three-page story to get to the meat of the matter.

Then she's all broken up about a guy that SHOULD mean very little to her, and he doesn't confront her? Is she that stupid that she doesn't see how it looks, even if nothing WAS going on, that since she knows something WAS going on that she should hide her feelings?

And why does she HAVE such feelings? Surely she considered this a vacation fling, not a lifetime romance?

sbrooks103xsbrooks103xover 7 years ago
@sdc97230

Yes, if he confronted her in Greece his knowledge of the affair might have brought him under suspicion, but as soon as they were out of Greece there should have been a confrontation. I liked the line in a comment about wolves chasing other men's sheep!

Impo_64Impo_64over 7 years ago
I liked the story...It's a good one...

I liked the story...It's a good one...But as some comment said the end was a little rushed we never will know if he told her she knew about her cheating or just divorced because they agreed they weren't getting along anymore...3*

sdc97230sdc97230over 7 years ago
Getting back from Greece wouldn't make a difference for him

Because he wanted to go back TO Greece for Eleni.

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
This was a good story but the ending left us wanting.

The ending was too short. It explained nothing. We need to know if he confronted her and what transpired . Did he have it out with her and what was her exercise. You really left this part out,which was important to close your story .

Blacksword404Blacksword404over 7 years ago
Just ok.

A lot of details. Which I liked. But Very little happened in the story. And the ending was flat. You used more words describing the islands they were on than how their marriage ended.

Rockyderek_caRockyderek_caover 7 years ago
4

Decent ending ... REDRUM ..... but i wouldve like to hear of her triubles more, why wont her hubby console or touch her etc.... what of the picture he took,?

tazz317tazz317over 7 years ago
#2 I WONDER IF SAM THE SHAM HAS READ THIS STORY

the verses fit very good with the tragedy. TK U MLJ LV NV

bruce22bruce22over 7 years ago
Good Story

I started reading it, afraid that it was going to be a pure cuck story. The ending was sudden for everyone including Susie, the protagonist , Wolfgang and the goat.

Keep up the good work....

AnnetteBishopAnnetteBishopover 7 years ago
Great writing

Very well told story and excellent story line. Great wordsmithing. I love the story xoxoxoxo Annette

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
4*s

Very well written story. Only missing two items. So I award it 4*s.

Understandable dialogue that completes the characters's thought and flows with their actions. Really enjoyed the physical description of the locations. The plot was well written and actions flowing smoothly from their thoughts.

Missing two items; her thinking. What was she feeling and thinking as Wolfgang seduced and conquered. And their confrontation. Sure he confronts her and divorced her back in England but it would have been a nice scene to end that part of the story.

Overall a very good story. I'll definitely look for more of your work Fredoberto. Thank you for the work.

AMerryman

Xzy89cXzy89cover 7 years ago
Half a story

Need more details on end of marriage and new greek friend. Why did she decide to start with german guy in first place.

sbrooks103xsbrooks103xover 7 years ago
@Xzy89c

LOL, she started it off with Wofgang because of his horse schlong!

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
Please please please

Listen to your audience. We like your stories . Just don't slam them shut. You must revel in the revenge. "She cried and we filed for divorce" is not an ending. Just as "I found my wife cheating, so I divorced her" is not a story. Please just work harder on the endings.

FredobertoFredobertoover 7 years agoAuthor
Listening to feedback

I'm working on a sequel, but it may be a while before I get it done. Meantime many thanks for all the helpful comments.

Pappy7Pappy7over 7 years ago
Thanks for the story.

Was a good read and plausible outcome. I do think that instead of the goat maybe Susie should have gone over the cliff with Wolfi, but I don't think he or I would want to kill his wife. I also can see where he, maybe, was in kind of a fog on what to do about the wife and when to do it, so slow is understood on the confrontation. It's possible that seeing your spouse fucking someone else might induce a kind of "fog of war" effect. Like making it hard to make a firm decision at that precise moment. The other side to the fog thing is maybe attacking them during the fuck. Might be okay if you have a stick, but the big guy might could do some damage.

Gave you a 4 rating and I'm not really sure that a sequel is called for. But I will read it if it shows up.

pappy

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
Need more thanks

This story in my opinion needs to talk about the cheating bitch getting burned and after it's all over she needs to be told exactly what happened to her horse cock lover!

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
Sissussie!

The confrontation in btb CANNOT happen off-stage! You're a very good writer show us how the bitch got burned!

BigGuy33BigGuy33over 7 years ago
No actual goats...

...we're harmed in the writing of this story.

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
Sometimes a good man

needs to pull a few weeds from the garden.

pathetic_cuckpathetic_cuckover 7 years ago
Is this meant to be erotic?

I can't tell if this story was meant to be an erotic fiction, or a series of journal entries about this guys vacation in Greece.

The interesting parts of this story all took place off stage and were described briefly or even just hinted toward. The core of the story appeared to be the restaurants and trails... was that intentional?

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
Pretty good

Did sound a bit like a travel monolog. I would have liked it better if he had pictures to confront his wife with and a little more detail of confronting her unfaithfulness. Better still would have been her walking back with the asshole and both of them went off the cliff.

EzrollinEzrollinabout 7 years ago

Either you have a vivid imagination or you're well traveled in the areas you write about. Your stories are interesting and well written but are lacking in erotic detail...not a criticism just my opinion...juice it up a little and I think you would get the higher scores that you deserve.

OnethirdOnethirdover 6 years ago
The meat of it

An excellent tale, cleverly folding in the classic fable. I was wondering if there would be a wolf in sheep’s clothing part, but one can only stretch so far. Stylistically this is a 5 star story, but I down rate middle-aged stories where a long loving relationship is tossed on the ash heap. What you usually have left is two lonely people past their prime and forced to downgrade, waiting for the grim reaper. The fact that the author chooses to reward the offended husband with a consolation prize is just wishful thinking. The wife came into a vacation situation that was too tempting. Sure, if she was banging the plumber back home she deserves it, but not for this.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 6 years ago
No ending left me in endless doubt...

They had sexy play together for much of their vacation ..... then she turns into a slut with this predator ........ then they don't talk to each other for what ....... 2-3 weeks ??

And, he has pix of her fucking the slimeball ..... and an island full of folks who know the slimeball's history, and Ya Ya's as well ....... talk about more than enough witnesses to provide testimonies ....... and he does nothing ...... Hard to believe so much has been left out of this interesting and creative storyline. I really would have enjoyed finding another cliff and another goat for Ya Ya.

ErotFanErotFanalmost 6 years ago
A fabulous story but sadly disappointing!

How could you not follow up on the story with the wife?

How could you not confront her with the Red Riding hood fable explaining the action of the woodsman?

The coda with Eleni comes off as a cop-out. All the air went out of the story in one rude fart!

Susie was given such a character build up and back story not to be part of the story resolution!

While I scored the writing highly, he "story" was terrible.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 6 years ago

Smooth sailing until the utter car crash ending.......no wrap up, no follow through and ends left dangling.

PowersworderPowersworderover 5 years ago

As others have said, unfortunately the ending just fizzled out. The confrontation scene between husband and wife is an important part of a loving wives story and you skipped that completely. An epilogue would have helped too, to wrap up loose ends.

Aside from that, it was hard to feel that much sympathy for the husband. He loves his wife so much, that when she sprains her ankle, he abandons her for entire days at a time to go hill-walking... What about actually looking after her?

This is also supposed to be a romantic holiday for the two of them, so he decides to take on a contract?! He then abandons his wife again for a couple of days, leaving her to hobble around while he flirts with the younger greek waitress, even though Susie objected to him working for her!

It's very rare I end up feeling any sympathy for the cheater, but I actually ended up feeling sorry for the wife being married to such a self-centred workaholic douchebag!

AnonymousAnonymousabout 5 years ago
I gave it a 3 because of the ending...

Was a good story, but wife got of free...

tkh3nkey2110tkh3nkey2110about 5 years ago
Not up to this author's standards

The first two page read to me like a travel log. I think that the ending was hurried. The author spent so much time with description in the beginning only to hurry the ending. He never addressed how the marriage ended or how he got his final revenge on the wife. Why do wronged husbands always want to wait to get more information? I don't think that is what happens in real life. I believe it is more about busting skulls.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 5 years ago
You are KIDding!

So, what sort of story did you imagine before you wrote this sadly disappointing travel tale?

The story would have benefitted from a storyline and a conclusion. Even Susie giving birth to a baby centaur might have brightened up the tale a little A confrontation with Susie seems to be missing. There were a number of opportunities to liven up this dreary tale of hiking and working! Perhaps leaving her on one of the islands while hubby flew home might have been explored, Not a good read I gave it 2** One because I am familiar with some of the Greek islands and my memories are good and another one for the goat wrestling! I never found the 3 musketeer islands you include in tour story

AnonymousAnonymousabout 4 years ago
Alternate meaning

Always thought a little red riding hood was a Russian contraceptive . . . .

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 4 years ago
"You're Everything

That a big bad wolf could want, Owoooo, I mean baa, baa..." Shoulda kept his sheep suit on. Wooly, Booly. There is a sequel folks.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 4 years ago

guess a proper 3rd chapter isn't coming up any time soon...

AnonymousAnonymousover 3 years ago

Just a little info: Athos, actually exists. Porthos and Aramis are nonsense - they do not exist. What is really funny with your story is that Mt. Athos is a peninsula - the easternmost leg of the Chalkidiki triple peninsula. What is ridiculous with your story is that Mt Athos is a Monastic State - it is inhabited exclusively by male monks and women are not allowed there. Mt Athos is semi-autonomous and governed by the council of the monastic community under the protection of the Republic of Greece. It was established back in the 9th Century by Imperial Decree which was upheld and honoured by the successor of the Byzantine Empire, the Ottoman Empire, as well as the successor of the Ottoman Empire, the Kingdom and Republic of Greece. As I said before, WOMEN ARE NOT ALLOWED TO SET FOOT on Mt Athos, there is NO TOURISM and the monks even resent the construction of modern roads - it is as ancient and original as can be... No heterosexual sex in Mt Athos I'm afraid...

FredobertoFredobertoover 3 years agoAuthor
Athos

Thanks for the interesting info about Mt Athos. Of course, there is no connection between the real Mt Athos and the fictional island of Athos in my story. For anyone interested, the names of the fictional islands of Athos, Porthos and Aramis were a nod to Alexandre Dumas, who also wrote fiction.

ErotFanErotFanover 3 years ago
I re-read this story after two years and felt the same disappointment

The one point I did like was the "Greek oracle's" advice about putting the walking stick to good use and Wolfgang's demise. Once again, in your stories, revenge seems to be served cold. Another feature of what I have read seems to be you avoidance of confrontation with the offending wife.

After that long build up the finale was a dud. I agree with author sbrooks103x's comment re build up with no resolution. Instead of an emotional release with a bang all the hot air escaped the pressure vessel with a poof instead of a bang.

I particularly the comment from our dear friend Anonymous, repeated below:

Eight Lines that Were Missed Out

A few days after we got home I spoke to Susie.

"I think it's time for us to get divorced."

She showed no emotion.

"Yes, I think that would be best."

There was a long silence, then she said,

"It's about Wolfgang isn't it."

"Chasing other men's sheep is a dangerous occupation for wolves."

She nodded and said no more.

Except I would change one line; "Chasing Red Riding Hood didn't turn out well for the Big Wolf, either."

swedishreader1swedishreader1over 3 years ago
One small point.

The Germans have chaged very little since the war.

The have just redirected their lust for power into the EU.

They are fundamentally the same people and thinking they have changed is incredibly

Naive.

Mr_Sap24Mr_Sap24about 3 years ago
I would

Have rather know about how the divorce went that his happy ending. Entertaining enough.

Rocky62Rocky62about 2 years ago

Missing a confrontation with the slutwife….. realization that hubby knew and maybe did mr big dick in

skruff101skruff101almost 2 years ago

Sorry where’s the divorce?

ChopinesqueChopinesquealmost 2 years ago

Interesting how the story handled the concluding interactions and divorce. Authorly restraint. Might be unique to Literotica.

Demosthenes384bcDemosthenes384bcalmost 2 years ago

As much as I would like to give it a 5, I can't. The story needed the detail surrounding their divorce. Did she ever confess? Did he show her the pictures? Just too much missing... 4*

WoodencavWoodencavalmost 2 years ago

The ending was short on detail. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Why dislike.

Vacation for togetherness.

She hurt.

You adjust your plans to things you can still do TOGETHER!!!

Not plans for I!!!. For we!!!

Working no only if clients demand And then drop them after.

Together no Wolf, Snake in grass etc

oldtwitoldtwitover 1 year ago

I love that in this story he really got his own back and stopped anyone else getting hurt by killing his foe.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

I do not think much of this story. It is like the others where the author seems to think big is better. The truth of the matter is women much prefer average. The large ones hurt and can even cause tearing requiring surgery. It would be refreshing if the authors would check the truth. I am saddened that people get pleasure reading about large penises giving women huge orgasms; which does not happen in reality. Men, those of you with average penises are blessed, those with oversized are not so.... just ask them.

Norseman123Norseman12312 months ago

Needed some BTB 4****

AnonymousAnonymous10 months ago

like the stupid comment from Anonymous how women like average size penises. Even if it were a woman writing that, she wouldn't know for all other women. We'd have to assume it is a man with a small dick. I have a large penis and no woman ever complained the first couple of times. Some of the small ones had to quit. But they were all grateful. You have your head up your ass.

Karl_HundassonKarl_Hundasson5 months ago

Good unusual btb :) 5*

enderlocke77enderlocke775 months ago

So what happen to the wife? Did a goat eat her?

enderlocke77enderlocke775 months ago

should have rid him of the wife in the first page and made a romance out of it with eleine

OldfinnOldfinn4 months ago

Good story, however I feel the end was a bit rushed.

Ocker53Ocker534 months ago

Their was no ending with the wife, deplorable ⭐️

AnonymousAnonymous8 days ago

the wife?

AnonymousAnonymous8 days ago

A loving, happy wife goes for a big cock...I am shocked.

Oatmeal1969Oatmeal1969about 1 hour ago

sure there could have been more of the conflict and divorce with the wife but I enjoyed it as is.

Anonymous
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Born many years ago in Glasgow, Scotland. Travelled the world, lived and worked in several countries and survived so far.

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