All Comments on 'The House by the Sea'

weird but good

It could use a little more editing. But all in all very good.

Very well written ! I found a lot of different themes in this story and found it very well written !! By far the best story I have read in this category by far !

Needs a thorough proof-reading to correct spelling errors. Two places 'paid' should be 'pain', etc.

I enjoyed it very much, I get into story's about vampires, werewolves, and thing's like that.

I don't normally read vampire stories but this one had a good twist to it - well written

Keep up the good work

Great story , loved every second of it. i would definitely read an extended version of it.

,

I really enjoyed this the few minor typos or grammatical errors in no way took me out of the gorgeous fantasy the author wove. I especially liked the way He became She and wasn't left in shemale limbo like a lot of the other stories in this category and girl on girl is always a hot idea.. Please expand this into a novel, as it is a really interestingly fresh take on the vampire transformation genre!

This is a notification that due to overwhelming positive responses to this story I'll be taking a break from writing stories for Literotica to turn "The House by the Sea" into a full novel! I'm really excited about this & I'll be working on it for some time hence the break. Thank you to everyone who have read my works & have supported me throughout my time here on this website.

Very well written. You did a great job developing the characters and I look forward to reading more of your work!

Your basic concept and story development is pretty good. You had two notable errors though. First was the diary entry, I am curious how a diary supposedly written by Sasha from her perspective switches to Harry's point of view or from a third person perspective featuring Harry. How would Sasha know what he was saying or even thinking just before entering the house and if she did, why didn'tt she act before it was too late? Secondly, while I realize Patrick and Ian's father may have been a harsh man and played favorites, I find it unreal and unbelievable that neither son would have a reaction or that it would sit right with Patricia when Sasha did what she did. If he was the decent person your story built him up to be, I find it unlikely he would do nothing to prevent it or stay with the perpetrator. If there had at least been some dire say life threatening reason, then just maybe. I saw a few lesser issues say correlating why he stayed and his upbringing.

Though it was told in a confusing way, (wrong perspective), the day of the hone invasion part did add greatly to the build up of the story. The dance scene reminded me strongly of a scene in the original Fright Night. In fact, the comparison of Charlie's girlfriend changing to look more like a long dead lost love vampire is similar as well or maybe a tribute? Though your story switches that to the main character and is done in a slightly less horror manner though not completely given the tribute. Thus your story focus on the drama and relationships more than Fright Night. Good story overall, I just have issues mainly with those two points as they do not seem consistent with story up to those points.

Get a good editor and proof reader and this tale can expand to a book (books?). Best wishes.

I would definitely buy this novel, it had me from the very beginning. You do need to have an editor go through though as there are a few errors. I loved the premise of the story and would love to see it "fleshed out " a bit. Keep writing!!

This is by far the best story on this website not just make to female I mean the best story in any category. Yeah it has some grammar mistakes but those are easily fixed and if this became a novel or novels I would buy them all

I enjoyed that so much that I con easily forget and forgive the incorrect words used in places.

With spell correct and all I'm going to blame it all on Microsoft or Apple, whichever you use.

Thank you for your time and effort in writing this story.

All anonymous comments should be banned, both good and bad reviews.

though idont particularlyliked thegenre,i am in awe of how u made a good story.....material worth reading

This was one of the best stories I have ever read and I hope that you've submitted it for publication somewhere. You are truly an excellent writer!

I very much enjoyed your story !! Found it very well written and would like to read it as a novel if you were ever to publish it wether here on Literotica or elsewhere !! Good luck !

please let us know if you have/will finished this as a novel. i cannot say how much i loved this story. thank you so very much for sharing this very touching story here. i wish you much happiness.

I came to this site looking for shorter and simpler erotic fiction. This story captivated me so much I lost interest in what I was looking for, and read it all the way through. Very well done, and I felt for the characters especially the vampire.

Thank you for sharing this excellent story with us Miles63. I hope be able to read the full novel soon :)

Brilliant I loved this story

What is the name of this book? House by the sea?

I guess that on a scale of 1 to 10,,10

being the best I will give you a ,,,,,,10 !

I love this story so soo much. Please if you have already decided to make it a novel send me the link, I would love to read it even pay for it but not that much because I'm poor. If not please countinue it. Thank you for the great story

I’ve been coming back to this work of yours for years. It always has been and always will be a favourite of mine