My Soul Mate Mother-in-Law

Acceptable Plot but Unreadable

It is obvious that English is not your first language so I would suggest you write in your native tongue and have someone translate it for you, which might address the shorthand presentation. I would also suggest that, if you are going to take your writing to the next level, you arrange to have an editor look at your work before you publish it.
In its present form this story is unreadable and certainly doesn't achieve the high level of eroticism you intended.

Thanks for a very enjoyable read.

I very much enjoyed your story. It is a pleasure to have a happy ending and sex with caring in an erotic story. The main characters are likable and seemed human and were easy to identify as people I would like to know. Thanks

A NICE LOVE STORY

IT IS EASY TO SEE THAT ENGLISH IS NOT YOUR NATIVE LANGUAGE. IF YOU ARE GOING TO CONTINUE TO WRITE, THEN MAY I SUGGEST THAT YOU HAVE SOMEONE PROOFREAD YOUR STORIES PRIOR TO SUBMITTING THEM FOR PUBLICATION. YOU NEED HELP IN THE COMPOSITION OF SENTENCES AND PARAGRAPHS, ALSO, THE PUNCTUATION NEEDS IMPROVEMENT. YOU ARE USING WORDS IN THE WRONG CONTEXT AS WELL. PLEASE DO NOT BE DISCOURAGED BY THESE COMMENTS FROM EVERYONE, WE ONLY WANT TO SEE YOU IMPROVE AS A WRITER. SO GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR FUTURE STORIES.

wtf ?

.... is this only a website for native English people ? I could read every word and understand the story very well.
Keep cool, people. Don't complain always. The meaning of the story is clear for everybody, right ?

Excellent

Very hot and excellent story. Anonymous critics are nothing but cowards, and should be banned. If you want to make a comment you should have to sign in, it's only fair. It's an excellent story, just delete the anonymous cowards.

Re: Excellent

Fuck you, gaynudist50. You're one of those assholes who think that you have to post your username on here to make comments. That's what this section is for, asshole.

You are a fucking asshole, first class. Did your little pea brain ever stop to think that some of these people don't have accounts here? Or maybe they don't like to leave comments via their user name because assholes like you PM them with shitty trollish comments.

You're another one of those assholes who wander around this site saying this same bullshit. The inability to deal with criticism is a sign of immaturity. It's even worse when the criticism isn't even directed towards you. Maybe we should start flagging your posts in these comments so we can get rid of you like we did vastiesmith2 AKA bonnietaylor2.

Easy to tell that ESL is the case here. As to what the guy above said about how this is not just a site for people who speak English as their primary language. You are correct but when you write a story and reading it is like listening to the teacher from the Peanuts comics it gets boring really fast. When the sentences are out of sync for us or sound monotone it gets boring.
This was terribly painful to read, I got three paragraphs in and had to stop.

It becomes a problem when....

I can get past a few language and grammar issues, but it becomes a problem when my brain starts spending time processing the language rather than the story. I couldn't get into the story because of the disconnect. Any number of people on here would be willing to edit for you. Take advantage of it!

Needs an Editor.

The premise of the story is understood, but the form of the story line needs to be fixed. It is obvious that English is not the authors first language, so a good editor would be required to salvage the whole entry from being a total loss.

wrong category

I agree with other comments about the editing,also this was not incest as both were single when they got together, there fore no longer related by marriage, so I think it should be put in another category, maybe put in Mature instead.

A very caring story about 2 single people who were previously related by his 1st marriage and now found they wanted to share their life. It was a great story plot and hopefully, there will be another chapter about their HOT sex life and other episodes that occur. As for the daughter / ex-wife - maybe it's time she learn by participating with them and / or just give them either privacy. Maybe the daughter can learn a few things ?? Thanks !!

Grammar

Good story, needs editing for proper English.

More dialogue

I skimmed it so I missed a lot of the errors mentioned in other comments.
Huge ponderous, paragraphs of prose lead me and many other readers scan for the important details eliminating any possibility of enjoying your presentation of the thoughts of obviously well developed characters.
Perhaps a better way, perhaps a more concise means well accepted by many authors, to expose your characters' character is through dialogue, things they say that show, rather than tell, who they are.
However, from what I did read, the story seemed believable, the characters real and engaging. As surely as most of the criticism posted here so far appears *constructive* intended to help and not discourage, you should continue writing.

BAD ENGLISH

Lost interest in this real quick. Like the second line, due to the horrendous English. Next time proofread your story. What a waste of a good story line

loved it

great story. just work on grammer.

Anonymous,

Your comments are welcome.

There are many ways to write and no one dare say there is a proper way. Everyone has his/her method. English is a widely use language. Mine may not be Queen English which American English derived from centuries ago.

It serve all of us here to read stories. Will it not be best for you to spend your time to write your stories instead of making repeated incoherent commentaries.

We all, I especially, can learn from your mastery of English writing. Progressive learning is my way of improving any languages. I don't intend to offend you. I state my case. Hope you take my reply in the right perspective.

Empathy, readers!

1. The category is «Incest/Taboo», and marying so as to become your ex-wife's step father easily qualifies under the second alternative for many people.

2. Yes, there are heaps of grammar and punctuation errors that a dedicated editor could have eliminated. However, for all of you lucky people who have English as your native language (and who can travel around the world to foreign countries and rightfully(!) expect the natives of most countries, in which you are a guest, to have learned your language rather than the contrary), what about a little change in attitude? Consider yourselves in a foreign country, (which most of this «digital global village» really is). There you meet a native person, and you are really lucky because, on the one hand, this person has an interesting story that he's willing to spend some of his time to tell you, and, on the other hand, he has used hours, days, months and years trying to learn your language so that you may understand what he's telling you. What do you do then? Stop him after three sentences by a "No, this doesn't work. You're not speaking as well as my fellow countrymen. I'm out!”? Activate your empathic circuits, engage your linguistic creativity for enhanced understanding and let content beat form - the world and your own life will become more enjoyable.

3. I liked this story in that it dealt with real people and real emotions. The narrative was something I haven't encountered before. What I didn't like, though, was the structure. The story is repeatedly making retrospective jumps to the storyteller's past with his ex-wife and also to the MIL's past divorce before that again. Such storytelling techniques are, of course, by themselves ordinary author tools. However, as they where repetitive - also in their content - it appeared somewhat messy. You even made such a repetitive backwards jump in the end after the carnal climax of the story, when you rather ought to be staying in the present or looking ahead.

And just tell thing once - you ought to have a very solid reason for repeating stuff.

So, tighten the story up somewhat the next time --
but do write more stories! - and definitely exploit the services offered by editors!

Generally a good story

Let us ignore the technical problems with the story, and English usage. When that is done this is an entertaining story with a good plot.