Home for the Holidays

Too short

The concept of the story is a good one but is far too short. Could do with some background and then have the situation develop rather than just straight into it

A little seduction

Story could of had a little build up

Meh...

This story wasn't all that bad, but it wasn't all that good, either. It's the same old worn plot device: Dad's been dead for a couple years, and Mom's lonely and not getting any, these days, so she seduces her son. Cookie cutter, all the way, with no dialogue and - oh, yeah - the son has one of these 'super-schlong' cocks that makes him the desire of every woman who sees him, and he's an abysmal horn-dog who fails to truly appreciate the unbelievably wonderful gift his mother offers him. To him, she's barely more than another notch on his bedpost.

Wait a minute! Can I take back my vote? I gave this piece of tripe a '3', when - now that I think about it for a minute - I should have given it a '1'!

Nice start to a lonely Mom and a horny son who is trying to make her feel wanted again. Yes, we need some details about them and the fact he can do much more sexually for her. Mom can teach him many things too I am sure. Now they have to shower together, get in bed and do it harder and many times ! Yes, please write another chapter or 2. Thank you.

Mom is the best

This needs to include the spring break version

Reference to comments

For those of you who responded with constructive criticism, I thank you for your input and advice. For the asshole anon, who gave me a 3 and decided to give me a 1, your rude comments and negative attitude is not welcome here, (or anywhere else), and If you bothered to check my profile, you would see that it is only a week old, and that thes are my first submissions. As far as being too short, and inadequately descriptive to your liking, it's nice to leave room for improvement, and a possibility of more chapters. It's a fictional story, and unlike reality, you can go forward and backwards in time to further narrate the story. Of course, being the anonymous coward that you are, no one can click your user name and critique your literary masterpieces, (probably nonexistent), and, unfortunately, you probably won't read this anyway, but I feel better having written it!!!

Thanks

We need more mom, son, stories.Lets encourage writers so maybe we can have more.Thanks for a good story.Hope you write more and soon

***

He oughta talk to her. And why doesn't he transfer to a college nearer by? So tender of him. How he slams his meatpole into her sopping wet pussy. You old romantic, you!

Where's the rest of the chapter?

Home for the holidays

I.
I.
I.
I.
Eye, eye.
Aye, aye.
Ayuh, ayuh.
So little about her. Most of your sentences start with you and not her.
Kit kat bar.

KEEP WRITING!

Bravo! Love your comment to Anonymous ‘Meh.’ You can bet he’ll read it. Have you read any of the Loving Wives comments? This guy is loveable when compared to the trolls living under that bridge.

Okay, now to business—I assume you’d like to improve and are open to constructive criticism—so here goes. You did select a well-used plot, but then what plot hasn’t been used over and over again? Answer is none—there are no completely new plots, best we can hope for is to add our special spin. Your paragraphs are awful short and you start too many sentences with “I”. You tell the stories with short bursts of facts; instead try showing us why and how they reached the point of incest. Let’s face it, no mother and son walk up to each other and start peeling off their clothes and getting it on, out of the clear blue.

Give us a little insight into their souls by using a little dialogue. You could improve story by making it a little longer. I’d also suggest you read stories by writers who have a lot of red ‘H’s’. I use ‘alwayswantedto’ as an example to study, but his work has been pulled.
Good Luck and keep writing!

crazy

This is just a fuck story not a damn novel. No romance just two horny adults going at it...

terrific story--five stars!

I was struck by the son saying, "we fucked like animals, with a primal lust which was matched by no other." Boys and their moms should take this to heart, it will open up their minds. They'll be able to bat away the really stupid actually insane idea that a boy's hard young cock should never ever what are you out of your mind come close to his own mother's warm wet cunt. What horseshit! The loving kid, and his cock, came out of that beautiful hairy hole between his loving mother's thighs. He's the one with the perfect right to shove his cock up his inside his mom up to his young balls and blow his balls, shooting his mom a great big twatfull of his creamy semen. Up his own mother's twat is where a boy's semen just fucking belongs!