All Comments on 'High School Harem Pt. 04'

Keep it up, I hope the next part comes soon.

Keep it up. Doing a good job

Very engaging and interesting. Keep up the good work :)

Love the story. No apologies needed. Can't wait for the next chapter

I can't wait to read the next chapter , I don't bookmark many stories but this one I did . Thanks for writing it and don't wait too long to continue

Jesus, it was kind of disgusting to fuck this black racist pig. Why would anyone write something like this? Horrible, now I feel violated and dirty on Alan behalf. And the story was so good until this... My only hope it the last time we read about this black asshole.

Pretty sure his fictional character isn't the only racist, bud.

This is a great story

The story is quite good over all so please keep writing! :=}

What a shame the bad English and miss used, miss spelled words distracted so much like "I sat in my computer chair and spined around to face her" You spun around not spined!! That one really stood out!!

the Mentor

aka derRaskell

im getting pretty tired of this whole "hung for a white boy" racist shit that exist in every erotica story were a black character is in, in fact medical research has already proven whites have a higher average dick size than blacks, i've started referring to ppl who peddle this shit as "bbc mythologists"

please just enjoy the story. a pussy is just a pussy it does't matter if it's a white one or a yellow one. the couch was realy hot so I would fuck her too

Did anyone else notice that derRaskell mispelled words in his post about spelling errors? Thought that was a ittle funny...

Instead of being dismayed, I thought he should have been pleased with himself that he got to fuck the hot black coach.

Good powwow scene with his girls. Maria, too.

Paul in Oklahoma

Mind you, The sex scenes are great too.

The thing is that it is a good story, which whilst unlikely is not beyond the realms of possibility, and it gives some good sex scenes. 👍

Not so impressed with some of the commenters, though:

"medical research has already proven whites have a higher average dick size than blacks"

My understanding is that the opposite was found, although the difference was not big enough to be relevant to individuals.

And I agree with Anonymous that derRaskell's complaints are somewhat hypocritical. His biggest complaint misquotes, and misspells the key word, as he says "I sat in my computer chair and spined around to face her". While "spined" would have definitely been wrong, the author actually says "I walked over and sat in my computer chair and spinned in it to face them." Whilst considered non-standard, "spinned" is still recognised as "simple past tense and past participle of spin".

Keep Up The Good Work!!

What happens to a person, No I mean a girl who falsely accuses a boy of rape. Do we prossicute her or relax the rules so she might come forward with the truth, like in your story.

Its a difficult position, in a private setting its one word agaist anothers.

I'm the dude who got falsely accused in something like it, school I was at shoved it under the rug when she came clean that she was lying, I missed a whole year and was treated with suspicion on everything I did from then on. Girl was allowed 2 do everything normally.

Dont know if that's unique for my situation cuz both of the girls parents were lawyers but that's what happened for me.

This started off good but has gotten dumb. The MC is entirely too forgiving, and having sex with the coach is just dumb. The students are 18 and therefore cant get into any real trouble for having sex, but the cameras in the locker room would get even a woman imprisoned for a couple years.

I've been enjoying this story, but after this chapter, I'm done. The entire story has been about how Maria ruined his life, but as soon as they meet up, he forgives her? What a pussy.

Generally, unless the girl has a known history of lying, they take her word outright and there is nothing the guy can say to change anything... he is fucked. And if she later recants her story, they will just sweep it under the rug as if she never said a word.

Now if there are actual rape charges brought against the guy, his lawyers will essentially make the girl out to be a total whore in court, and unless she was a virgin at the time of the incident, they usually succeed and the guy walks...

Our so called 'Justice System' is anything but just a lot of the time...

Why do all of you always make these dudes out like big ol pussy boys? Put head down and just take whatever authority says. Go off on someone. I’m in trouble, I’m scared, please don’t do anything to me.

Coach told me to pull my cock out. For whatever reason I couldn’t disobey her. Always ruin stories with stupid shit. Better off just to end the story. For whatever reason you have to keep adding. Plus after “magical” night with molly he shouldn’t been rushing to have another girl anyway. Claiming those feelings he should have thought about it some. Maybe text molly see if she felt ok with it. You write like they falling in love but then throws that out and rushed for other girl. No love at all

Author, forget what those people said that the mc was a "pussy." He was just empathetic, something these other commenters certainly doesn't relate to. I mean wth she had been slashing her wrists I'm not going to put her down after seeing that.

I'm tired of this constant comparison of dicks. Porn videos are fantasies. Found a dozen black guys with more or less big dicks. Picked some miniature actresses for contrast. He's 180-190 centimeters, she's 150-155 centimeters tall. And here's the legend of big black dicks.

The title of "The World's Longest Dick" is held by famous New York actor and showman John Cardelli Falcon, born in 1970. His penis is as long as 34 centimeters (according to other sources, 35 centimeters) when erect (14 inches).

Condom manufacturers from various countries in Europe, Asia and America regularly conduct penis size studies to determine production parameters. Their samples are larger and more accurate than clinical studies. The average is 13-14 centimeters or 5.5 inches. Regardless of countries and races.

Cameras in locker rooms are illegal, the coach can be taken by the ass. I think the girls will find a way to take advantage of that.

Parental pressure on kids is very varied and strong. It doesn't depend on the age of the kids. It is very difficult to resist. It is worth not only to forgive Maria ( she seems frank and regrets her actions and words ) but also to introduce her to the harem. Strong girls together will support and help to get out of the control of the parents. In principle, at 18, she is of legal age and can live separately and earn money. You can find options.

I have no issues with the story, but please do something about the rampant comma splices. Good punctuation helps keep the reader immersed in the story. It provides the rhythm of the tale. If you think that's unimportant, try listening to your favorite music with the drums removed.

It's fictional story, why get hung up on grammar? Love the story so far. AAAA++++

Good job; thanks for sharing your work!

Good writing and descriptions. Also, thanks for the heads up about the hard ending. Though it still seemed to fit the tone of the overall story.

Good going so far but certainly a rollercoaster of emotions

Alan’s Mom was NOT the Headmistress if the School last chapter. That development/alteration was a shock.

Sex with the Coach was inevitable. But, Alan didn’t SAY anything! It was forced, rushed and not of the tender, consensual quality seen in other chapters. Alan got used as a thing. Flesh out that relationship or drop it. Give Alan an equal footing. Somehow, make them friends.

Drama in stories is fine provided that it has a purpose. Too much drama though and you start to wonder why you began reading it in the first place.

I disagree with the people who think there should not be any Drama. It is what makes this a real story with real people, and not a quick Bang Bang clip with images only. I enjoy the investment of my time to read and be rewarded with characters that I can relate to. Keep up the great work and don't let the Bastards grid you down.

Alan should go to his mother and explain what her parents are doing and the cutting on her wrists. She might succeed one day and then he would feel like shit and blame himself. Either way I would find a way to expose her parents for the pieces of shit that they are.

how can 1 say more that wow...omg!!!!!

PLS.......never stop writing!!!!!!!!!!

Good to get the air cleared and set for the next run on the rollercoaster. Another well thought out and written chapter. I look forward to reading the next. I appreciate your and your Muse's imagination (memories?) and abilities to bring it to your story. Thank you for sharing your vision and talents.

Clear the air all around. Another well thought out and written chapter. I look forward to reading the next. I appreciate your and your Muse's imagination and abilities to bring it to your story. Thank you for sharing your vision and talents.

I thought it was a great story

You didn’t leave this chapter on a soar note as you stated, it’s called clarification, now we all know the real reasons what happened with his old girlfriend who I really feel for now. Even though I want him to end up permanently with especially Molly and the other three. I’d hate too see them all drift apart at the end when they graduate and I wouldn’t even begrudge him adding his ex back in as well and even extracts some retribution on her parents ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Not sure if you consider it, but you should have Alan's mother sue Maria's parents for slander. Maria can side with Alan's family and after being disowned taken in by Alan's family and brought into the private school on a scholarship. What happens from there... who knows. Just a thought.

I'm glad she apologized and I don't think Alan should hate her, but I also feel Alan accepted the apology too quickly.

'Digged' his phone out? 'Spinned' his chair around?

Love the story though!!!!

The only somewhat annoying thing about Alan is his lack of aggressiveness. I suppose it makes sense given his high school status, but the tryst (likely first of many, as indicated) with the volleyball coach should enlighten him that his prowess is not just limited to 'peer' high school girls, but fully mature women. From this point on, any woman, including not only other female teachers but female students' relatives (i.e. especially initially 'outraged' mothers), should be fair game. In turn, since she used the threat of expulsion to trap him into sex, he should turn the tables on Mrs. Jones during their next session, film her having sex with a technical minor, and threaten to expose her to both the school and her husband (willingness to risk expulsion, a part of brinkmanship) unless they make these sessions permanent on an at least weekly basis: effectively forcing her fully into the harem. It then won't be long before she's on the fertile side of her monthly cycle.

Definitely felt the sudden reversal of Alan here was way beyond ridiculous. Someone helps implicate you in a false rape, and then you just soin around and hug them and forgive them? BS.