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English
Loose end
What did the phone ringing have to do with anything? That seemed unclear.
Not superior but nice to read!!!!
What a memorably day!!! A story without cheating, cuckolding or other crap!!! Thats loving wives!!!
Sucked
Never write again . You sick at it ya cum eater . Here is my used condom . Chew on that it is full .
What was the plot?
Was there supposed to be any purpose or point to this story?
Sigh! about as erotic as
drinking flat champagne while reading a washing machine manual. Just rutting.
CATCH UP SEX 101
ne-er the couple should mingle. TK U MLJ LV NV
Ravish
Ravish, not ravage. Unless you want to be beaten up.
Author's Comments
Ok, Ok. I wrote this for my girlfriend as a quick e-mail and it is lacking in many of the facets that make up a good story, including character development (it was about the two of us, so none was needed). This is my first posting on Literotica and a learning experience, hence, my request for feedback. Based on comments from this and other stories, I attempted to redeem myself by improving subsequent narratives. So, I invite you to overlook this one and read my other stories since they have received much more positive feedback.
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