A common enough scenario, but spoiled by little character development and please have someone edit your work moving forward. Far too many mistakes that a spell checker would not find, but are grammatically wrong.
Let's see your next effort soon.
by
Anonymous01/08/17
Editing
Needs it.
by
Anonymous01/09/17
never ment to be
Well if you really had loved her the bet never would have crossed your mind. If she had really loved you going with him never would have crossed her mind. So life goes on and if she has a black baby no white man would ever want her again. They say once a wife goes black she'll never goes back. Then again who would want her.
Keep working on it sweetie. You need to do a better job of proof reading or maybe an editor. It was almost exciting but by the end it was sad, nothing erotic.
English
Why worry
No doubt , women leave their husbands . In this situation HE'S FAR BETTER OFF WITHOUT HER !
5 stars
Well written, enjoyable and realistic story.
Wow!
Hopefully her family would disown her for this, I know I would.
Enjoyable, but needs editing and development
A common enough scenario, but spoiled by little character development and please have someone edit your work moving forward. Far too many mistakes that a spell checker would not find, but are grammatically wrong.
Let's see your next effort soon.
Editing
Needs it.
never ment to be
Well if you really had loved her the bet never would have crossed your mind. If she had really loved you going with him never would have crossed her mind. So life goes on and if she has a black baby no white man would ever want her again. They say once a wife goes black she'll never goes back. Then again who would want her.
Could have been a good story
Keep working on it sweetie. You need to do a better job of proof reading or maybe an editor. It was almost exciting but by the end it was sad, nothing erotic.
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