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English
Boring
Very predictable very boring yawn
Predictable...Had to brother or Dad
overall not bad
re: Predictable...Had to brother or Dad
Yeah. A twist ending only works if the readers don't see it coming. Because of the category it was apparent he was some relative. I guess the argument would be it's a reveal and not a twist, but even then it's not much of a reveal.
B/c you didn't let us know who they were to each other it made it boring. You didn't know their connection so I couldn't feel a connection. Yes I knew they were related but not the exact relationship. Your twist backfired for me & just made it boring
Total crap
The relationship is revealed at the end??? Crappola!!!
Wow!
Good job. I wondered if this was your direction. Is this just a one off or is more on the way?
"I wondered if this was your direction."
Really? How could anyone "wonder" about the direction? It was obvious from the start.
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