Yeah. A twist ending only works if the readers don't see it coming. Because of the category it was apparent he was some relative. I guess the argument would be it's a reveal and not a twist, but even then it's not much of a reveal.
B/c you didn't let us know who they were to each other it made it boring. You didn't know their connection so I couldn't feel a connection. Yes I knew they were related but not the exact relationship. Your twist backfired for me & just made it boring
by
Anonymous02/01/17
Total crap
The relationship is revealed at the end??? Crappola!!!
by
Anonymous02/01/17
Wow!
Good job. I wondered if this was your direction. Is this just a one off or is more on the way?
by
Anonymous02/01/17
"I wondered if this was your direction."
Really? How could anyone "wonder" about the direction? It was obvious from the start.
English
Boring
Very predictable very boring yawn
Predictable...Had to brother or Dad
overall not bad
re: Predictable...Had to brother or Dad
Yeah. A twist ending only works if the readers don't see it coming. Because of the category it was apparent he was some relative. I guess the argument would be it's a reveal and not a twist, but even then it's not much of a reveal.
B/c you didn't let us know who they were to each other it made it boring. You didn't know their connection so I couldn't feel a connection. Yes I knew they were related but not the exact relationship. Your twist backfired for me & just made it boring
Total crap
The relationship is revealed at the end??? Crappola!!!
Wow!
Good job. I wondered if this was your direction. Is this just a one off or is more on the way?
"I wondered if this was your direction."
Really? How could anyone "wonder" about the direction? It was obvious from the start.
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