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English
Why did you say you had to find an editor
In my opinion you have a knack for writing a smooth flowing story keeping my interest the whole time.
I am looking forward to the next instalment and possible further stories.
Thank you for sharing your story with us.
The 5* is in anticipation of your future contributions
DON'T BE SLOW
Your "BEGINNING" chapter leaves me to think of many possibilities where you will take us on your JOURNEY...the horses, then chickens, then cattle, EXPLORING the HOMESTEAD after all it is a BIG SPREAD so he needs to FILL it with enough chores to take away from becoming lonely. BUT, a companion, and growing another family seem in the foreseeable future. And of course giving a NAME for his dog.
Many interesting thoughts going forward into the next chapter(s).
So I give you a "5" in anticipation of the SAGA this story will become. (Has so much potential, can't be just 3 -4 chapters).
My Thanks.
Wow...
This is your first story? Bravo! Well done, I look forward to more :) now you get to deal with impatient readers :)
Promising start
I like this already, some good ideas about a practical man coping with an impossible heartache. Five stars. Look forward to seeing what evolves from the scenario. As for editing, some stutters here and there, but you have an easy natural conversational writing style which carries the reader through effortlessly. The next chapter will encounter the handling of dialogue, but relax and approach it as you have the narrative and, fingers crossed, you can keep us coming back for more.
Good start
Let me start by saying that this story really grabs my attention, and I look forward to the rest of it. That said, it was very difficult to get through parts off it. Almost the first ten lines were one extremely long sentence, and there were few breaks through the rest of the first page. It's hard to read from line to line sometimes and easy to have to re-read a line for fear of skipping one. Add some more breaks and paragraphs, ands this would be even better.
Interesting Start
Nicely set up for an interesting relationship development. I think this could have been done in one page with some introduction of what's to come.
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