Favors Ch. 02

Good start

I think your chapters should be a little bit longer but that's just me. Hopefully don't have to wait to long for the next chapter.

Proofreaders

Look at the homepage under resources.

Good story

I think your story was good enough, but it was the execution that brought some issues... The mistakes I saw were basic, and judging from the rest of your ideas and vocabulary, this isn't outside of your abilities.. There are apparently volunteer proofers on the site if you don't have a trusted friend.

Keep it up! (the writing)

Thanks for the feedback. I have tried looking for a volunteer editor before submitting this chapter. I think I have found one in the forums. Hopefully,it works out.

Keep Going

My comments of a week ago still apply and a proofreader would be a good idea although you really need some help with grammar and sentence construction more than anything. If you have a desire to improve your writing skills you should look into those. If not you should definitely keep writing because you can still share your stories and ideas even if a few commenters offer only negativity.

Pretty good...

You can read my comment from Chapter 1, so I won't go over the same items. I really am starting to like this story. It is getting better, thus the 5*. You are making me care about the characters. There isn't too much blatant, over the top, sex. You are showing that despite the BDsm theme, the love between the incestuous participants is still there and real. Good job.