All Comments on 'Cristi'

Very good subject. Excellent for your first submission, keep it up.

. . . this what I call a SWSL .. . story WITHOUT story-line!

I love it when people leave feedback and don't leave their name. You did a great job...don't believe a word that wanker says.

Well put together.

Maybe some of the early contact could have been more descriptive, but I enjoyed it.

I thought the story was going great, good story line and good concpet and that, but it seemed very rushed, like no 'fill ins' between the trysts. Like if they were brother and sister during the day there would be interactions and that sorta thing which i reckon would be cool to add more excitement and daring to the story. Also the ending pretty much in the same line it just ended so abruptly... but yeah still a good story.

Okay, in the beginning, you said that she was in college, then towards the end you said that she was younger than the you. And you said you were only in high school. What the hell's up with that?

Good story but does need more substance to the story.

I'm not a writer, But I do know what I like to read and you are on the way to being very good.

I look forward to more from you.

A little something about the days and their feelings would have filled in the story more.

It's a good concept, but it seems to be lacking rhythm. I'm a writer here, and I just find my stories don't work if I can't get it flowing. And that's what seems to have happened here. But it's a good start

Can't wait for the next chapter, need some mutual masturbation and teasing in public or behind the parents back, before progressing to intercourse.

your story got to me big time... Just to think of a younger woman watching me jerk off... and the next time watching her hand stroke me... Im in Heaven... thanks for the story... Larry...

Now that was hot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I would love to have my sister jack me off. Wow!

This story was really good. Got me off anyway. I was a little confused about the ages of the brother and sister toward the end but thats ok. You are on your way to being a great writer.

This was good. Now, the confusion of ages is just a small error, but that was one of very few that I found. I think there needs to be a little more to it. There are some things that need some fleshing out. Like for instance, there should be a little more on the sister. What she does, where she lives, etc. Otherwise, this was a very good story. It holds together very well.

--Timothy Ivanson

well, I have to say, I had a hard cock to play with too.. just the visioon of you and your sister enjoying each other was sooo damn sexy.. mmmm would love to hear more..

before it gets into her cunt.

Talk about pain and smell and clean up---Sickening

I liked what there was of it, despite the age mix-up, but there really should have been more. A good beginning to a potentially good story...don't leave us hanging.

Come on now-

This is poorly done! It has a nice start but if she was so hesitant at first, she surely wouldn't ask him to cum on her and then fucking her ass? Were you serious when you wrote this or did you intend to write a bad story?

you killed it in the first paragraph if you don't get along with someone you sure aren't going to rely one them or get advice from them because you know they will never be honest with you and give bad advice think before you write the whole story got ruined in the first paragraph

We both were virgins and didn't intend to fuck but we both needed the experience. That and we were hot for each other. We started off masturbating in front of each other, then masturbating each other. This continued for a couple of weeks. Next came oral sex then one time when I bent over to suck on her nipples my dick came in contact with her very wet pussy. Well before we knew it I was pounding her pussy as hard as I could.

i had a house key she forgot hers.she was sittin on the potch as i came in and im very ouiet she had her dress up fingering heself.her blouse was open and she had one tit in her other hand .oohh im sorry she said no dont b was my reply . u want some help .herans was yes he was such a jerk tonite but got me started and i just had too.well i shocked her and dropped to my knees and devoured her haiirypussy she was estatic and cunvulsed instantly .i unzipped and she removed my cock it was rock hard . as she stroked it i stood and offered it to her mouth. she sloly engulfed it all till i was ready i told her she just took itall till i came.well we talked some and went in house finding ma out on the couch so w went to our respective beds u wnt the rest ask it is exciting and alot happens ,