homeErotic PoetryAn Evening T/together Part 10Public Comments

All Comments  for

An Evening T/together Part 10

byCobra2100©
All
Comments (2)
by Anonymous

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Anonymous07/15/04

Description

If you string all of the evening together you get a boring collection of "He did this, then that". Perhaps the image you had in your mind excited you as you put your words down, but you did not transfer any of that excitement to the paper. This is an excellent example of "telling" instead of "showing". It does not make for good poetry.

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Anonymous07/24/04

wow

Contrary to the comment before mine, I loved this short story. It definitely excited me.. and another friend.. chuckles.
Wonderfully written.

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.

Click here to leave your own comment on this submission!  or
Back to An Evening T/together Part 10  or
More submissions by Cobra2100.

Add a
Comment

Post a public comment on this submission (click here to send private anonymous feedback to the author instead).

Post comment as (click to select):

You may also listen to a recording of the characters.

Preview comment

Forgot your password?

Please wait

Change picture

Your current user avatar, all sizes:

Default size User Picture  Medium size User Picture  Small size User Picture  Tiny size User Picture

You have a new user avatar waiting for moderation.

Select new user avatar:

   Cancel