All Comments on 'A Teasing Game Goes a Bit Too Far'

Very few people like second person P.O.V. stories. Definitely not a good way to start out. First person or third person is really the way to go, especially for a beginner. Keep writing!

You write well, and this is a nicely spun D/s story with a refreshingly assertive submissive.

KristieBechir's advice is sound. Give 1st or 3rd person a try because most readers find these POVs more accessible. (I suggest starting with 1st person.) With your ability you would do it quite well... and don't forget the cuffs, blindfolds, leather, etc. :)

if this man cannot handle having his wrists tied to the bed head, why does he consent in the first place?! ;) instead of bondage games why doesnt he go try video games ?! when can we have some real men in the non con/ reluctance stories?;)

me can enjoy getting tied up by our women. I do. What's not to like? Just another way to enjoy sex.

When you guys talk about second person I'm not sure what you mean. This story is in the first person, but it uses "you" rather than a character name. A second person viewpoint would be entirely about "you" without "I" as a character. First person with "you" as the other character is extremely common on Literotica, especially in bondage porn.

What is more unusual is the use of the present tense.

Your first foray into writing erotica was a success. I can only imagine what a wonderful lover you are. As a black man with what some women have told me is a large dick, your writing has tapped unto a fantasy I have always had. To have a woman be completely in charge of everything we do sexually. Generally, by the time my hard dick comes into the arena, my lover has been calling me daddy for several minutes, "Yes, Daddy" "Anything you want Daddy", Thank you so much for keeping my throbbing black dick hard and throbbing throughout your tease. I look forward to your next story.