I was extremely irritated with the story in that it seemed to have great potential with no delivery. Why build us up to show us nothing in the end? Don't do it again. Readers have needs too.
by
Anonymous09/09/05
yeah, maybe
I have to agree with a previous comment: Lots of potential, but alas, all lost.
While I was slogging forward, working to forgive the irritating lack of detail (And just what did she do at that party?), suddenly the writing stops. Where was the story?
In all fairness, you did well with the mechanical details of writing (grammar, punctuation, sentence construction, etc). But the story line was more a concept than a completed work.
-- KVK
by
Anonymous09/09/05
"Zzzzzzzzzz"
Wow that sucked
by
Anonymous09/10/05
Really bad
Pretty much the worst story I have ever read on Literotica.
Okay so this story did not fit the over supplied something or other DD mammaries nor the exaggerated deformed dick but there was true elements of erotic truth in the mourning of 'what might have been'
Damned true !
English
Love's Labors lost
I was extremely irritated with the story in that it seemed to have great potential with no delivery. Why build us up to show us nothing in the end? Don't do it again. Readers have needs too.
yeah, maybe
I have to agree with a previous comment: Lots of potential, but alas, all lost.
While I was slogging forward, working to forgive the irritating lack of detail (And just what did she do at that party?), suddenly the writing stops. Where was the story?
In all fairness, you did well with the mechanical details of writing (grammar, punctuation, sentence construction, etc). But the story line was more a concept than a completed work.
-- KVK
"Zzzzzzzzzz"
Wow that sucked
Really bad
Pretty much the worst story I have ever read on Literotica.
Jeez. they are small minded
Okay so this story did not fit the over supplied something or other DD mammaries nor the exaggerated deformed dick but there was true elements of erotic truth in the mourning of 'what might have been'
Damned true !
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