Shame you didn't continue this story - original and pretty hot. The writing wasn't crappy but I thought it was a bad place to leave it hanging without adding another chapter soon after.
by
Anonymous02/19/05
Good read
Could have added another page; I'm sure there was more than just one night! While I'm at it,... Left everyone hanging.... out where Jordan and King always do- good job! And!, excellent punctuation, spelling; good breakage of topics... almost as if I edited it, myself!
Dan
GREAT,MORE ,MORE
Can see where this line is going and waiting wating for part two.Love your story sujects,adding you to my favourites list
Pity
Shame you didn't continue this story - original and pretty hot. The writing wasn't crappy but I thought it was a bad place to leave it hanging without adding another chapter soon after.
Good read
Could have added another page; I'm sure there was more than just one night! While I'm at it,... Left everyone hanging.... out where Jordan and King always do- good job! And!, excellent punctuation, spelling; good breakage of topics... almost as if I edited it, myself!
Dan
Read it once before
But I left it alone as it seemed incomplete. I see there's a part 2 so we'll see. I will say though that this part was fairly well written. Ronnie W.
Waiting...
for the cumming action. (yes, very bad.) Waiting for additional chapters to appear.
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