All Comments on 'For the Love of Lana Ch. 06'

That's enough for me... I'm done... this has turned into an illogical... ridiculous mess... you've got a 900 year old vampire using dialog of a jr high school girl... and the plot is all over the place... paragraphs have to be read at least 3 times to make sense of them... I'm done... thanx for the effort...

-jaye-

So what is the plot? Good stories typically have the plots known within 1 chapter. All your stories are dragged out with elementary writing and unclear plots. Plots is plural because it’s all over the place. Get a grip. Get an editor. Tighten everything up and the story would be more interesting.