All Comments on 'A Slut's Triangle Pt. 21'

My o my, what's a CD to do? Seems like these sexy bitches are gonna turn him straight!

So worth the wait. You writing is utterly gorgeous, captivating. The humor & sensuality is excellent. The cliffhanger at the end is extremely creepy, leaving me scared at what Kryss will do. He's so crazed he is capable of extreme brutality. Left me on edge, can't eait for the next chapter.

I hope Kryss gets his ass kicked by all the girls. It'd be ironic justice if Ash gets to fuck him in the ass for a change too, but the implications are kind of gross at the same time. Nobody likes a hairy ass...well, unless you like a hairy ass. but that would in my opinion go against the trend of smooth asses that have been illustrated since chapter 1....

Unless Ashleigh's ass is hairy, considering there aren't any mentions in the story about personal grooming e.g. shaving.

Nice job Kant - you had such depth to the characters in this scene. Fantastic job. Love the cliffhanger ending.

Thanks for the great read.

You set this one up really well. Can't wait for the next installment!

"An awkward moment of silence sweeps through Brenda's bedroom like a wildfire as everyone's eyes fall upon me. Dressed in a tight, black leather skirt with a corset, stiletto heels, and makeup, I'm horribly out of place despite how feminine I appear as a transvestite."

This whole paragraph is awkward. A 'moment' of silence wouldn't sweep like wildfire. something like, "An awkward hush falls in Brenda's bedroom as all eyes turn to me. In spite of my feminine attire of black leather skirt, corset, stiletto heels and makeup, I feel horribly out of place." might be better. After 20 chapters I'm pretty sure everyone knows he's a transvestite.

"I'm still wearing thigh high stiletto heels. With Brenda busy eating Kimberly's pussy, standing up on Brenda's bed to fuck Kimberly's ass probably isn't such a good idea." Shoes are removable.

"Outside, Kryss turns the headlights off on his car. Creeping through the darkness, he pulls up and parks across the street from Brenda's house. With Brenda's bedroom curtains closed, there's no way for us to see his red Mustang parked in the street, scoping out the all-girls party."

If the curtains are closed and it's dark, and there is "no way for us to see his red Mustang" how does he know the car is there, if he can't see it? This makes no sense at all.

Ignore anonymous i foumd it very well written, and you left us with quite a cliff hanger this time. I hope Kryss get what he deserves in the next chapter.

Yes, ignore anyone who takes the time to give you constructive criticism to help you improve your writing. I notice "robertreams" on the forum mentioned the same problematic examples I did, but ignore him too. Ignore everyone but those who just want porn to whack off to, if you truly don't care about improving the quality/literacy of your writing. There's nothing wrong with that, if that's your only aim. I've seen so many people here asking for feedback when they really mean they want only compliments. You need to make that clear.

Mr or Miss anonymous, perhaps it's a poor choice of words on my part in saying "ignore anonymous." I should have said remember to always take what anonymous says with a grain of salt.

Outstanding. The benchmark for excellence.