All Comments on 'Hellsapoppin''

Sentences start with a Capital letter!!

It was hard to tell where sentences started and ended. Poor effort. I got as far as the first paragraph. I think you're trying to give your readers a headache.

I liked the story and thought it was pretty good; however, as the previous reply said, you should proofread your stories before submitting them. I hope to hear more about what "The Last" and "Hellion" are. Keep writing and you will become much better at it. Practice Makes perfect.

there's a reason that none of it is capitalised... and punctuated with ellipses... if you can't be inventive enough to read through different grammar then don't bother...