All Comments on 'The Strap-On'

You weren't even consistent with the tense of the story. You started out with "Jenny called me and asked me for a favor...", and then swiftly switch to "Jenny tells me the date..." and "Jenny shows up about an hour before the party..."

So which is it? Past tense: "Jenny called." Or present tense: "Jenny calls."?

It's details like that which make the difference between holding your reader's attention and losing it. You lost mine.

Well it definitely.held my interest, when is the next chapter?

Pay no mind to trolls like Something. A few grammatical errors can always be overlooked if a story is hot enough, and yours was. The only thing distractionwas you once called Jenny, Becky. Keep your character names consistent and with stories like this you will do fine. With practice that is. And I hope to see you 'practice' a lot more. Jenny said she wasn't gonna go down on her friend. She said nothing about having friend go down on her, especially after giving her her best orgasm ever. Just a thought. Five stars.

Thank you for all the comments and all the feedback. I did change Jenny's name at one point and thought I had changed all of them so I did miss that one and I agree after looking back that the tense change was sloppy. Just a quick little fictional story I had an idea about with some things based in truth. I hope to do better with writing in the future and maybe find a good editor lol.

I enjoyed your story,not too long..very interested in the next chapter

Three minutes rule doesn't apply to just your boyfriend anymore. How long did it take for Jenny to bring you the new model.