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interesting
Very different, but very well written! I enjoyed it thoroughly
Needs to be longer and more descriptive
Doesn't effectively get us into Lindsey's head. It feels jarring and off when descriptions of her pleasure are introduced because the reader isn't included in her thoughts and feelings much, last we'd checked in with her she was elated with the chance to escape. There's no resolution of her mental conflict. First person might have worked better for you.
It was a nice change to see a story like this with a good grasp of female anatomy though, and the premise was mysterious and interesting.
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