All Comments on 'Things That Go Hump in the Night'

by Stefan_J

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  • 111 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
Thank you

I think I just awarded my first 5. Very well done. Thank you.

nomadorionnomadorionover 19 years ago
Best.Story.Ever.

Best Story Ever. I mean it.

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
Excellent!

Having read so many stories, I've never felt the need to write a comment. Until now.

Best damn story I've ever read! Thank you for this.

sacksackover 19 years ago
Takes a lot of imagination

This story could have been very trite and hokey in the wrong hands....but you made it believable, and that is no small feat. It's particularly difficult to make an "apparition" sympathetic, but obviously that is "child's play to you. Good luck with the contest!!

MinkkuffsMinkkuffsover 19 years ago
Encore! Encore!

Enjoyed reading your story. I hope Peter has more "encounters"

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
Wonderful

What a wonderful and thoughtful story.

You have great style my friend.

Best Wishes,

D.Scott.

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
gr8 read

hi there ,loved the story it was very well writen with an ending thats open to possibilities..i for 1 hope that there maybee a follow up piece in the making . my rating would be a 10,congratulations & regards from geoff

ryno506ryno506over 19 years ago
this is a great story

this is a great story and it is believable. great story from a great auther keep it up

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
Fandangotastic

I'm speechless.....MORE.

edmastersedmastersover 19 years ago
This was awesome man...

So far I think this could be your best story yet. You took great care on developing the main character and did a great job on setting up the mood for the whole thing.

Its was awesome man, Congratulations.

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
WOW!!!

Another great story, well written, with believable characters, even funny... fantastic. I loved it. Although I don't think, that a sequel is really necessary. The end is well done.

Quiet ListenerQuiet Listenerover 19 years ago
A Story! Fancy that.

Excellent style and structure. Very convincing character voice. Story's been done, but what hasn't? Besides, you made it your own. Nice interpretation of the role of the supernatural, understated, which I like. Peter was something of a stock character, but writen with feeling and what I would guess is a fair amount of personal expirience (seeing as I had no problem identifying with him). My only compalaint would be that you used so many metaphores, I found myself reading the story instead of living it, which is the objective. Still, if you were going for a comic-book feel, they fit. It's odd to see an actual story here on Literotica, and while I'm happy with the usual wham-bams that make their apppearance here, your story deserves to win. This one is the only Halloween submission getting a 5 from me.

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
WOW

Awesome story. Kepted me focused from start to finish. It goes with out saying it needs a sequel between Peter and Anna.

sherlock40sherlock40over 19 years ago
Fantastic story

This story is sure to make the top five greatest stories on this site. Very well-written. Thank you for your time and effort in making this a very special story.

ChemE_studentChemE_studentover 19 years ago
Broken Record

Not to sound like one, but this is a wonderful story. It's the most well-written of any I've read on Lit, and I appreciate all the effort you put into it.

Thanks!

foopidstuckfoopidstuckover 19 years ago
Captivating

After reading the first few paragraphs of a story, I'll usually scroll to the bottom to find out the number of pages. I normally click out if there's more than 3. This story kept me in it's grasp from the first paragraph, I just couldn't stop reading. Excellent job!

cuml8lycuml8lyover 19 years ago
Phew!

Well, you know what I think? I think this has topped even The Last Nice Guy. Even though you know I'm not a big comic book fan, you did an awesome job in convincing me maybe I should read one or two again. Just in case something fun might happen in my fantasies. Loved it!!! Smooches

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
Superb!

What a sweet and sexy story! Finely crafted and very well written... perhaps the best I have ever read in this forum!

FarnexFarnexover 19 years ago
A dream come true

I have been reading Literotica stories for years and I never read more than a three chapter one. This one is the BEST I have EVER read. Being a virgin geek comic guy I was right there with him at every point. The other posters have said it better then I, but this story will be remembered by me and go in to my personal fantasy file. If erotic literature was more mainstream you would be a millionair. Thank you again for a wonderful story.

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
Wonderfully poignant story

Well written. Tender. An excellent job. Thoroughly enjoyed reading it

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
Hell yeah!

Awesome story, you HAVE to write a part 2. I don't usually comment on stories, but this one is damn cool. Keep up the good work.

wytethornewytethorneover 19 years ago
Spellbinding

The story was fantastic. The way it was told was gripping and completely spellbinding..I will be sure to keep watch for more of your tales..

LoneWolf73LoneWolf73over 19 years ago
You got me, tiger :-)

I've been reading stories on Lit for... I don't even know anymore, let's say, a *long* time.

This one's definitely not the hottest I've read here, but the *story* is so emotional, so well-written and so, let's face it, plain cool, that this is the first story that ever prompet me to leave a comment.

Very cool stuff! On the one hand I hope there'll be a sequel, on the other hand I think this would be just like the Matrix sequels - whatever comes next can't be nearly as good as the original story, and might even destroy the magic.

cinbad6679cinbad6679over 19 years ago
GREAT STORY!!

I absolutely loved this story. You did a great job writing this. I definitely feel it should continue with peter and anna. But for now this was great. Thanks

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
Continue with the Delusional Romance with Mary...

the Anna Jone angle is just a distraction. the impossible, when it is possible, is more unearthly romantic than the ordinary.

don't remember the author, but there's one other story similar to this in Literotica, about a sad gringo moving to some souther state where there's a lot of beautiful senoritas and fell in love with one, who happened to die sometime ago,,, they met and fell deeply in love with each other, with him bringing flowers to her everything they met,,,, but once his curiosity drove him to find out the "real truth" about her, the knowledge about her death severed their connection forever, but he continued to take flowers to some cementary place where he used to meet her and would talk to her, by himself, laughing and crying,,, eventually the local village kids came to call him the "local gringo" or something,,, it was a very well written, short story about losing one's mind, going into delusion,,,

as for THIS STORY, I think the story/author should explore having Mary come back (not as in the "Monkey's Paw") to this dimension, to be with the young man whose virginity (as well as heart) she took! she can't "go back" and get more "assignments" anywhere, since she violated the rules, "God's rules", (having "free will") so badly this time around,,,

she might as well come back to this life --- if she's able to once, she's able to again --- and stay permanently; grow up and mature; get married and have a family and live and life's beauty and sorrows to the fullest, with someone she loves. Why should she or any other young people suffer for the mistakes of others? They should be able to "come back" to this interesting existence and participate in it!

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
Wow

I've never felt the need to comment on a story before, but you should know that that was probably the best story I've read on this site. Great job. The balance of emotional content and sexual content kept me interested throughout. I'll definately be back to read a part 2. Thanks.

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
Superlative

You possess a great talent. I hope you write as your vocation. If not, please consider it.

I have never sent a response to the authors of the stories on Lit., although I have read hundreds (maybe thousands)? I was moved by your story to commnent. Keep up the good work. (and thanks!)

SabledrakeSabledrakeover 19 years ago
Sweet

Well-written and romantic with wonderful touches of humor, good character development, a great story!

Softly WhispersSoftly Whispersover 19 years ago
WOW

Although it was fairly obvious as to how this tale would end, it was not the end that was the point of the tale. The point was to draw us a masterful glimpse of the frustration and anxiety and fear that so many teens live through. You told this in a sweet, never overly sweet, way and as I read it, I smiled, remembering all to well those years long ago. Thank you.

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
wow.

great story and really well-written, i'm really impressed.

it would be also great if you could continue it, to show us what happens with the main character's friend..

HenryDavidThoreauHenryDavidThoreauover 19 years ago
A Little Throw-back, Halloween Romance

ah, first love (or first "real" love),,, it really does last a life time (even if just in our neurons),,, if it is with the right person,,, and especially if it is fleeting,,, not due to person choice but circumstances beyond the young lovers' control,,, the what-if's, could-have's, might-have's, should-have's

Dana GallagherDana Gallagherover 19 years ago
Amazing!

I don't know what I could say that hasn't already been said here, but this is truely a wonderful story. I was enthralled and I normal don't have the patience for such long stories, even though I tend to write long ones. Thanks for such a wonderful read!!

MarsipanneMarsipanneover 19 years ago
Amazing

I love the geek-boy touches in here, they give the story emotional resonance. All your stories have that something special that makes you feel warm and fuzzy as well as horny. You're truly a talented writer.

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
Good shit.

The best Holloween story I have read so far. Though It might have been fairly obvious, the wit and execution made it work great.

BeckyAMHBeckyAMHover 19 years ago
Wonderful

I really can't say much about this that I havn't already told you. I loved the main character, he's just the kinda guy that I go for and the plot was perfect and even though you knew how it would end, it didn't ruin the story as it does with most others. Keep writing because I can't wait to read your next one. You defintaly should have won first place because the one that did win was nothing compared to this.

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
Nice work!

The quality of writing on this story is exceptional. It's smooth, cheeky, and engaging. Very well done.

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
Awesome

Once again--your stories are amazing, they aren't just an "erotic story", the plots are always completely engaging. Incredible work as usual!!!!

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
Top Marks

I read all the comments before I read the story & I was determined to find something to niggle about - but I cannot. 10/10.

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
Fantastic

Amazing as usual

AnonymousAnonymousover 19 years ago
Very Nice, possible Chap 2?

I hope you are working on chapter 2. I'd love to read what happens next to our Friendly Neighborhood Spiderman. :-P

AnonymousAnonymousabout 19 years ago
BRAVO - MORE

I can't get enough of your writing. Please do Chap 2 so we can see the changes in his life.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 19 years ago
Write more stories please!

Seriously, you are a testament to fine literatue. You do to erotic stories what Homer did to epic poems. Really though, write more! Do it for us, your fans! People out there are yearning for stories of the romantic caliber you give us, not just another sexed up orgy. This story in particular was brilliant (although when Mary said 'It comes with the territory' I was on to it, and I'll be honest: it kinda freaked me out!) And your other story "The Last Nice Guy in Town" was one of the best short stories I've ever read. Please, WRITE MORE!!! Have a wonderful life my friend. God bless.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
Excellent story

You have talent. If you are not pursuing a career as a writer you are doing the world a big disservice. This story with a few changes is mainstream publishable.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
wow !

that was amazing ! very sweet and emotional too. definately the best one i've read so far .i agree that the 2nd chapter has to be written ! once again , WOW !!!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
Great job

I have read hundreds of stories on here but have never felt the nee dto vote or even comment but yours I just had to. Great job and keep writing

AnonymousAnonymousover 18 years ago
Wonderful Story

Great story ... had a few too many comic book references for my tastes, but that's just me.

AnonymousAnonymousover 18 years ago
nice story

i think it would be cool if you added a second chapter to the story i would definitely read it. i dont what it was but i had to read thru to the end. nice job.

AvarcalionAvarcalionover 18 years ago
Heartbreakingly Romantic

Wow; this story is so romantic and sweet. You did a great job on setting it up. Great job with the details too. If only everyone's first time could be like this. I hope my first time is half as perfect as Peter's. I'd like to find out what happens between Peter and Anna. Keep the stories coming.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 18 years ago
HeartBreakingly Romantic

I love this story!! I almost cried lol. I love all your writing. I hope to read me.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 18 years ago
Explicitly Extraordinary

I've given up reading about sex. I think thats what I like so much about your writing. The sex really isn't what your writing about. You write about emotion, love, and life. This story was absolutely captivating. For me, the best part about a story is what leads up to the sex. Because, lets face it, how much can really be said new about blowjobs and sex. This story is refreshing for the tale that makes the reader so captivated by the sexual encounter.

I-WISHI-WISHalmost 18 years ago
Wonderful Story

Excellent writing, if you don't write for a living you should consider it.

Silk_SheetsSilk_Sheetsover 17 years ago
Breathtaking

Stories like this remind me of why I became a writer. More than that, stories like this remind me of why I love my life. Praise for your writing cannot be overstated. It was beautiful, and epic, and real. Really real. Thank you. I speak for everyone when I say: Thank you.

AnonymousAnonymousover 17 years ago
Totally unexpected!

A year reading in this site, I find it the best!

AnonymousAnonymousover 17 years ago
Terrific Story

Absolutely the best i've read so far on this site.It tells a wonderful romantic story. Thanks for sharing

AnonymousAnonymousover 17 years ago
Incredible!

It was a long story.... much longer than others around of its genre. But it was oh so worth it! I think it was a really neat idea to have Mary as she was. I almost cried at the end! Reminds me of a friend of mine in a way. She's a firm believer in the supernatural, and I think this story fits her belief perfectly. It's there, yes, but not so much as to set off the..."BS" detector. Well done, Goodsir (or Ma'dam)!

AnonymousAnonymousover 17 years ago
The Story

The best fucking story I have ever read. This story has changed my life. I fucking love you.

AnonymousAnonymousover 17 years ago
I am very glad her head didn't fall off.

Sorry that was a reference to an old ghost story.

But Wow. Why can't I be haunted?

AnonymousAnonymousover 17 years ago
Amazing

Whatever you do don't give up writing because that, would quite possibly be, the dumbest thing you could probably do, i loved your story and I hope to hear more from you.

V.

AnonymousAnonymousover 17 years ago
Thanks ^_^

Ever had the feeling of, when having watched a show in a theatre, and all the actors come out to bow, that it's the wrong people bowing, and it really should be the audience? That is how i feel right now :). Best stroy I've ever read. And perhaps the best i'll have read for a longer period of time. No simpler way to put it :). I bow in the dust for you.

goldenalbertgoldenalbertover 17 years ago
Things do go hump in the night

This is by far the most interesting approach to story writing

I love your expressions of "Oh God" and "Jesus" to which she always responded, "Mary" which to the theological set means Mother of God or Feminine Aspect of God.... in that situation she is truely the Feminine Aspect of God initiating you into the manhood you were ready to enter.... it would be interesting to read about your date with Ann, the girl, who was to get your virginity.... how did that work out.... and how are you preserving the lime/yellow panties?

Ethereal sex isthe fantasy come true, and I do mean cum true.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 17 years ago
Super Supernatural

Makes me want to start liking Haloween. Beautifully developed plot and characters. Sexually exciting as well as Mysterious. Keep writing. I like your style

AnonymousAnonymousabout 17 years ago
:(

so sad :(...saw it coming a mile off and yet i still feel sad...keep writing or stuff will haunt you :P

AnonymousAnonymousover 16 years ago
Loved it, Stefen J

Was nearly in tears - this from a sixty year old bloke!!

AnonymousAnonymousover 16 years ago
Amazing

This was a fantastic story, but the romantic in me was hoping for an answered plea to god that would see them living happily ever after. Bravo!!!

AnonymousAnonymousover 15 years ago
Awesome story!

Loved every moment! leaves me wanting more.

AnonymousAnonymousover 15 years ago
amazing story

Thought this was one of the best stories I've read in a long time.

AnonymousAnonymousover 15 years ago
Very Good

Third story of yours I have read tonight, and the three have been some of the best I have read.

Keep up the good work.

AnonymousAnonymousover 15 years ago
Fantastic

That was very remarkable, absolutely the best story I've read here. I find it interesting that no one else noticed the parallel in Mary's name. Mary Watts, or Mary Jane Watson, our friendly neighborhood Spiderman's love interest? I trust this was intentional, but it seems to have passed largely unnoticed.

taxpapabobtaxpapabobover 15 years ago
One Hump in the Night Is Worth Two

Great, if ultimately wistful, RED HOT SEX filled with joy & laughter! I love it!!! The beginning is deceptively slow, with some light humor between two virginal, nerdly nerdish nerds. Then Peter Parker wanders out on Halloween and blunders into the cemetery, where he is approached by Mary Watts (hint, hint), who decelebates his brains out on a lush bed of fresh 8-in. grass. The sex is absolutely miraculous, with each determined to bring optimal joy and fulfillment to the other. And the splendidly written hilarity made me stop again and again to laugh out loud: In his passion he cries out, "Oh, Jesus!" She responds, "No. I'm Mary." He thinks his erection so loves her vagina that it wants "to pitch a tent and take up residence." I thought I wasn't going to like the inevitable ending as they kissed farewell, but even that was perfect in its wistfulness and eery spirituality. Did I say I loved it? Wrong. I ADORE IT!!

taxpapabobtaxpapabobabout 15 years ago
Oh, yes, do go hump in the night

This HOT-HOT SEX tale is really a beautiful, if touched with sadness, romance. It's a bit of a horror (well, haunted) story, with almost science fiction elements and strong humor. In passion he cries out, "Jesus!" To which she immediately answers, "No. I'm Mary." It's a fabulous trick AND treat on Halloween. Maybe this, and not a spider, is what gave Peter Parker his powers. I LOVE IT!

AnonymousAnonymousover 14 years ago
Another well written story

You are a very talented and gifted writer. Your stories are consistently well done and enjoyable to read. It is easy for a reader to notice mistakes while reading a story, but the well crafted just flows without interuption or hesitation. I am very much enjoying your material. anon jerry

AnonymousAnonymousover 13 years ago

need more

AnonymousAnonymousover 13 years ago
A continuation is needed!

It would be lovely if you could build on this story and also let his best friend meet someone he could love. Besides I want to know how it went for him at the party...

Nicely written, go on please!

AnonymousAnonymousover 13 years ago
Hmm

Cool

AnonymousAnonymousover 13 years ago
Not just intriguing

This is the third story I've read by you. I just can't stop!! I will continue reading things by you, but I'm afraid of running out!! Please write more! You kept me on the edge of my seat the whole time.

PeterspeterPeterspeterabout 13 years ago
No more.

Nope, this is the end of this story. It's terrific, just leave it be. On the other hand, take a guy into life, not a guy named Peter Parker, something else, how does a nice, nerdy guy go about living over, say, the next two years? Finish school, summer, freshman year, second summer. There will be lots of us waiting.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago
Well done

A great read

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago
fabulous

It was so refreshing to read a story written by someone with intelligence! No grammatical errors or stupid spelling mistakes to be found. Also, your sense of humor is great. You are a very good writer and I am going to go read some more of your stuff!

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
Amazing

Dear Stefan_J, loved your story, although I knew where the story was headed, I felt inclined to read it on for the way you wrote it. Bravo, keep up the good work, Best wishes.

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
Outstanding

I don't know if you're still around the site but this is one of the best stories I've read here.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 12 years ago
Truely Excellent

A fantastic story. I would be interested to read what happens with Peter and Anna. Love is easy, relationships are hard. The story of Peter and Anna's first time could be a beautiful story, even with what he learned from Mary or perhaps because of it.

Even if you chose not to continue the story of Peter and Anna, you have writen an excellent story, the first I have ever left a comment on in the almost 3 years of reading stories on this site. Keep up the great work.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 12 years ago

you're great. I read the top and just couldnt stop, and that's 'cos you're intelligent and humorous not like the half-educated fellas with hard-to-discern stories. Try writing on parker and ann, I'll be looking out for that. Kudos stefan.

toppsy0turvvytoppsy0turvvyalmost 12 years ago
liked this

enjoyable story

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
Well done

You have a rare brilliance.

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
Wow.

This is a truly amazing story, being an author myself (though never having actually written erotic fiction), I must say 'Well done!' for producing such an amazing story. I absolutely loved the ending, and wouldn't mind seeing a sequel. I throughly enjoyed it.

loveyournurseloveyournurseover 11 years ago
Seriously well done!

Loved the story. Things aren't totally over the top and raunchy, and you're freaking funny.

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
HOLY CRAP!

That was one of the best stories ive read here

br00br00over 11 years ago
Speechless...

Normally I wouldn't have given this title a second glance, but I figured since it was a week away from Halloween, I'd give it a shot. Very happy that I did. I absolutely loved this. A sequel would be awesome.

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
.... Seriously?

You go through all that and it ends with a ghostly encounter... I was loving the story until that. Really, so close.

barrymanilowbarrymanilowabout 11 years ago
Great story

As a Spider-Man fan I liked all the little touches. But I think it would have worked better if Anna was the one named after MJ and the dead girl was given a name reminiscent of Gwen Stacy (like, Jenn Tracy or something). I think it would have worked better thematically since Gwen died in the comics and MJ didn't, and Gwen was his first love and MJ was his second (which is even mentioned in the story).

AnonymousAnonymousabout 11 years ago
Well done!

That was an amazing story, somewhat inspiring, it's practically given me a new method to life.

VersewritersiVersewritersialmost 11 years ago
Great Story

Loved this story. I had a feeling she was a ghost but didn't want to believe it till I read it. Despite that I think this is a unique romance story and am satisfied with the ending. It'd be interesting if Mary possessed Anna to have some fun with Peter from time to time.

roveroneroveroneover 10 years ago
Sublime!

your 2nd story I've read-another 10/10

Like "The Last Nice Guy..." really LOVED the dialogue

AnonymousAnonymousabout 10 years ago
Sighs; another lovely lil tale

It's mind-boggling to think of how many hum-drum stories are out here; then I run across yours and am pleased with every single one; even though they aren't necessarily to my own taste.

I wasn't sure if Mary was a Ghost, a Vampire, or a Werewolf; but actually wish that they could've pulled one of the voodoo type of events to have her come back as a living person. She broke the rules, did things that she wasn't supposed to do, changed his destiny in a way that wasn't preordained. I think that she ruined Peter for Anna.. Not only that but you didn't give them enough time together to let him deposit semen where it belonged.

I was actually crying when she had to leave; she deserved so much more out of life

Thanks;

DKP

also added to my ALL-TIME FAV bookmarks

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 10 years ago
More than what was expected.

I was led to this tale under the reccomendation of another, I am still not sure what I was expecting but whatever it was, was dashed by your fantastic story. So many elements hit home and when the end came around, I was in tears and filled with memories of one of my own first relationship which ended in a similar fashion. Overall, the story was fantastic and easily broke the measly expectations that I held for a story that I had never read. I believe my favorite part out of all of it however was the main character and his development, feeling as if this was a twisted telling of my own first time.

AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago
Another Story from the "Twilight Zone"

Accept for the sex part this was a perfect 'love story' that would have been suited for the Twilight Zone series back in the early 60's. Sadly, I knew where you were going as soon as the cemetery came into play. We all have 'angels' that watch over us but this angel was a little physical. Technically, you know, you can 'see' angels but you can't feel them but who is being technical, this is a fantasy. However of Mary has a friend....send her my way. Actually a very sweet love story reminiscent of the Movie "City of Angels". Angels falling in love with their charges. It would make a great TV movie script. Good Job. Now, where is the story about Anna and Peter? P.S. By the way: You can have sex with an angel in one way... it is called a "Wet Dream".

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 9 years ago
awesome story

I loved this story. A touch of supernatural made this great. I was reluctant at first cause all the references too comics. Not that I'm not a fan, I am. Thought you used too much but the end made up for it. Keep working.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 9 years ago

What? Tears? Naw man its just raining... Indoor...

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
wish

I wish you would add to your stories. It sad you stopped. Well done for all you have shared

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Hmmm

So Virgin wimp boy gets some with a dead spirit slut. Sooo romantic...NOT!

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