Felt this was a good turn on.
Please slow down next time. Also do a better job of proofreading. It's "definitely". Not "defiantly"! Nice try, though.
The premise is good...needs a little more at the end.
try slowing down & elaborating more. premise is hot, your just need a little character development & more details. like to see your next attempt.
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GOOD START
Felt this was a good turn on.
Could have been better
Please slow down next time. Also do a better job of proofreading. It's "definitely". Not "defiantly"! Nice try, though.
Could have been better
Please slow down next time. Also do a better job of proofreading. It's "definitely". Not "defiantly"! Nice try, though.
Alright
The premise is good...needs a little more at the end.
great potential
try slowing down & elaborating more. premise is hot, your just need a little character development & more details. like to see your next attempt.
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! or
Back to Extra Credit or
More submissions by bebechick.