All Comments on 'Porto - Beijing'

The part of the poem in italics has some odd tense changes that read a bit awkwardly. You might want to check on this..are you sure that was the way you intended it? Liked the closing paragraph....very effective!!

not italics, actually very small print. How can "he" expect to have something published "post mortem" if he's already dead? Is it just late at night or am I missing something here?

Sack

Certainly NOT for the "uneducated."

Very powerful, Lauren. I was left confused at what was a quote, what was a reference, and what was your poem, maybe they were all one. Also, there is a reference to his date of death, and then reads that he makes baskets to this day... that is a pretty cool trick! lol! Thanks for the story and the poem.

An exceptionally powerful end, and beautifully, searingly sarcastic :D

Is this part your own words? Sorry, if the question is lame. I have a feeling it is. lol

* Shang Tong, pseudonym of Li Tuan (circa 1390-1420), was a basket-maker as a child. In addition to the fond memory, he kept the grateful pleasure of still today, at age 79, making rocking chairs. He never put it in his CV, though, which includes, in his own words, three long short stories, six short long novels, and one still unseen book of poems that he expects will be published post-mortem.

can't claim with all truth that I understand every single word, but the overall impression was very deep, left me feeling like I just read something so profound and revealing, like I need to look up some stuff and go to bed tonight a smarter person. ;)

LOL - I'll start with the easy one.

Eve:

All of it is my own words. But there was a Chinese poet named Li Tuan who lived between 1390 and 1420 and who sometimes used the pseudonym of Shang Tong, who was supposed to a 79 year-old poet, formerly a soldier, formerly a wickerworker.

Sack:

Yes, all is as I indented (except there should be an extra line between the smaller print and the paragraph/stanza that follows it). As for your doubt of how can he expect to have something published post-mortem if he's already dead, note that the dates (1390-1420) refer to Li Tuan, the person, and not to Shang Tong, the persona. That should explain the small incongruences you noticed. ;)

Thanks for the comments, everyone.

They don't show a thermometer with 95...

Not everything from a Master can be a masterpiece, but almost everything will show mastery. This is very nice.

The footnote (why is it placed where it is?) aided my understanding. I felt that the last lines were particularly powerful and thought-provoking.

At one point, I felt I hit a bump in the road and was bounced out of the poetry truck onto the road of essay: "I hardly knew that the language I articulated couldn't amount to a coherent theoretical defence, but it formed, fundamentally, the poetics ..."

At that point I experienced some minor disappointment I guess. Yet, the contrast fits with the rest of the poem. Thanks for the enjoyment.

to the mountain, the man, the poet. The whisper of butterfly wings, so soft, so powerful... Well done.

jim : )