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Pretty good actually.
better than most of the usual on here.a good effort,and a worthy read.You might wanna work on your transition,and ease into the sex part more.But,the dialogue isn't too bad,and it's a believeable scenario.Cheers to you,and waiting on part 2.
More!
I Love the topic. Good story. Waiting for Part 2!
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Good as far as it went, didm't go far enough.
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great start but wheres the next part
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