All Comments on 'Mother and Daughter: Ellen & Elisa'

You are quite good, in my opinion. I like your voice. You should have more dialogue. Make it a story where people talk. Take your time. This girl needs to be fucked. The mother needs to be fucked. So chapter 2 is in order. You have talent. You're smart.

Lame. Seriously lame. Written by a 10 year old? Stilted dialogue. Uninspiring sex description. I've gotten more aroused over a VS catalogue.

IronCross55

Needs some work.

However, it was good.

Mom and Daughter is every man's dream

That's the word for you. You're very funny. This is excellent stuff. You have a voice, you're very smart, you've got it!

Your story telling is excellent. I love how you develop your story with Mom showing how it's done, without treating it like a lesson. I'm sad to see you're not still writing!

Your story telling is excellent. I love how you develop your story with Mom showing how it's done, without treating it like a lesson. I'm sad to see you're not still writing!