All Comments on 'April Fool's from a Creator'

"Third quarter 40 sec. before the 4th in the game." - Odd wording. Why not simply say, "40 seconds left in the third quarter," or "Third quarter, 40 seconds left." I think that "4th quarter" is pretty much implied, it couldn't be "Third quarter... before the 2nd!"

I believe that "seconds" should be spelled out, and in both your version, and my second version, there should be a comma after "Third quarter." Say it out loud, you should feel a pause there, which means a comma.

"As a young male child" - This is a little stilted. "As a young child" is sufficient. If you feel that you need to identify your sex at this moment, then "As a young boy" is better. After all, isn't that what a "boy" is, a young male child?

I'm sorry, I realize this is about dreams, but it is so disjointed that it is hard for me to read. You should really get an editor.

I happen to echo sbrook's comment fully.

Regarding the third last paragraph, it struck me that the elusive answer to that Question may be solved as clumsily posed below.

There is the fact that a large percentage of men will achieve an orgasm before the woman through the simple act of penetration or coupling. A significant percentage of women never achieve an orgasm through the copulation act alone during their lifetime. Mostly perhaps two hands full minutes for the man, with two hands full and toes included minutes for the woman to achieve an orgasm. With exceptions of course.

Now, for the big reveal why women can achieve more orgasms over a given time or 'last longer' before they are sexually sated as compared to men (as posed in the Question): It's all in the Creator's design.

Why? The man requires, through biological design, a definite 'recovery' period after an orgasm, and that may cause so-called cooling during the intimate act. The simple fact is that men, perhaps more so women since they are the nurturers, should they not be sexually satisfied in any given relationship or situation, will be prone seek or Hunt for that satisfaction with another sexual partner. Neglecting the euphoria achieved during the act, subconsciously, sexual intercourse is an attempt at procreation. Barring marriage, this phenomenon is the cause of a large percentage of divorces in our times.

In ancient times, before marriage, vows and faithfulness in a intimate relationship were founded and sought, the Creator intended that man should procreate with the greatest diversity of DNA or genes being reproduced in the next generations. The effect was that parents, their offspring and perhaps siblings may have had widely different DNA and gene properties in the then family unit due to the Hunt.

Also, the close family unit cohesion as we know it today, played a much lesser part in those times.This had the effect that inbreeding, which heightened the chance of regressive DNA or genes being introduced in the next generation thereby producing a less superior race, was not such a serious risk or issue.

Keep in mind that in the early times of man, the average life expectancy of males and females may have been in the twenties or thirties due to disease and medical issues, and the key action would have been survival of the race, thus procreation.

Referring to those times, should the male of the moment not be able to sexually satisfy the female or have less active 'swimmers', the very next male in the Hunt may just be lucky to have one of his 'swimmers' fertilize the 'egg' first.

Okay, shoot me down, that is my humble, largely uneducated, take on the answer to that Question. One might ramble on and on, this comment may be already too long.

Seriously joking there.

Awakads, These facts I already knew, and a lot males would not have survived through puberty. This would be because illness and injury and falling prey to predators.

But, wouldn't be grand if men could have that long orgasmic euphoria that women in our world today could or can have? Instead of the, slam-bam thank you mam, thing we seem to do.

I appreciate the comment.

sbrooks, you are correct on your comment. I didn't transition from the dreams to reality very well it is disjointed and other parts. I would use an editor, any suggestions?

I appreciate your's also.

Fun read, somewhat 'disjointed' as commented, but carry on. It can only get better with more experience and editing. Then checked the comments and awakds comes on like a male chauvinist - surprise! female? Interesting, possible. Go Sista! Never dwelled on that answer, also interesting.

I think we all have "weird" dreams of our own. I have but, unlike you, I have never put them on paper. Maybe one of these days I will. Thanks for the inspiration to think of something new. Best wishes in your works.

"I could see the colors of the trees and grasses and looked around an seen I was on a rise in the land."

NO! The correct usage here is "an saw" (perhaps you meant "and" in place of "an").

I seen an owl fly to the window and land. NO! "I saw" . . .

Instopped reading there. Not rated. The use of the verb "seen" is never used in a simple past tense. It could be usd in the various perfect tenses: "I have seen", "I had seen"; but never "I seen"!

I am particularly interested in what you are referring to as "D'ni" language. Living along the I-40 stretch in NM, I think of the language of the reservation.

Aside from my personal curiosity, the parallels of your dreams with the experiences of my life are utterly against the odds.

Well told, I like the way you have used the structure of this to be very dream-like to read.

Well done.

I am pleased to have found this piece, and will now go read some of the other submissions of a potential favorite author.

I will score this higher than most of my scores because I relate so closely to the content and suggestions you make regarding yourself. I, of course, forgot that it was an April Fools submission.

Please write another April Fools story as the contest is about to start for 2019. I'll meet you there.

ExperiencedStoryteller

I must post my Literotica handle here. For some reason, the sign-in page is not responding to my keyboard right now.

Writing good but scenario no

Interesting thoughts...