All Comments on 'Lilith's Emporium: Awakened Ch. 01'

Great story however it seriously needed proof-reading. It lost five stars and was heading for only three, but since it is the first part of a series (hopefully) it reached a four. But please - more proof-reading required as the story deserves it.

I love this series and I’m looking forward to more...

As soon as i read Rorickstead my whole suspension of disbelive crumbled. Please us original or real names.

More

Whatever, i enjoyed it. Looking forward to the next episode.

Excellent first part. And I eagerly look forward to more.

Also I got a good chuckle at someone letting something as minor as a Skyrim town name being used as it hurting the story.

I'm never disappointed by your stories, this is no exception, another master piece! I happily look forward to what you make next!

Would have loved for the story of these 2 characters to continue into more chapters....

This could be a great story series

I think you have a great start for more than the two chapters you mentioned. The could be plenty of adventure, building the plot to finding her parents or family. If you only did one more chapter it would seem way too short. This was put together so well and this first chapter only feels like an intro to something awesome.

Great fic... although your spelling of “tale” is not the right one, it should be spelled “tail”

You need a proofreader but great plot and characters. Can't wait to read the rest of story.

I've enjoyed the stories about the emporium but on this one you seem distracted or rushed, from the spelling issues and the incorrect word use it made it a struggle to enjoy. Also I am curious about the use of wonder and wander, many stories on this site seem to use these incorrectly. A person can look on in wonder but they wander around a store. Do you all dictate the stories?

Excellent story and I like the pacing. I sure hope she only fed so much as to cause him to become unconscious, for this has the beginnings of a very saucy sexy tale. More please!

Loved it, more please <3

Great story and great pacing. All seems to fit in just perfect.

Can't wait for more

Small things needed to make it even better, but did not detract from the story.

Thanks for sharing.

Like all your Emporium stories, this sucked me right in (see what I did there?).

Looking forward to seeing the next chapter!

Also, I hope that Jason & Selena meet lots of interesting new characters in the course of their adventure together.

Can't wait for the next chapter.