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curtains drawn

bybluerains©
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by Anonymous

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by WickedEve01/27/05

I like vampires

The sexy cool ones. You know the ones you just can't wait to see munch on someone. "Bite me! Bite her! Bite someone."

Okay, the poem. :)

This part is a real gem:
"dreams like vampires
are kindling for sunbeams"

"his heart bemoaned awakened
to drawn curtains
streaked in liquid tears"
If you don't mind a slight suggestion, I think having the words bemoaned and awakened side by side doesn't quite work. And liquid tears is okay, but it's a little redundant. All tears are liquid unless there is some sort of dust tears that vamps have. I'm guessing that's possible. ;)

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by Liar01/28/05

Reviewed...

Your poem has been mentioned in the New Poems thread over at the forum.

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by Syndra Lynn01/29/05

Wow!

this is perfectly delicious. Very well written. Thanks

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