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Great Start
It is a good story, and has a great start. I hope Jack "wins" in the end. Whether he gets Gloria ( after she comes to her senses ), or maybe someone else ( maybe one of the escort women who wants a normal marriage). I don't care for the part where he chooses an aquantinces' wife to be the maid/sex partner. If he is so loyal, and has good morals, values then why would he stoop to having sex with someone else's wife?. I hope Jumal loses everything in the end, but unfortunately women do seem to go for the a-holes, and regret it later.
A Man - Finally
Damn - good show author - so nice to see a real man on this site - thanks!!! Us woman readers like real man!
Can you please keep it up.
Best of JPB
This is a very good start JPB. Thanks for writing and thanks for portraying a guy whi will not be cheated in his bargain with what appears to be a devil!
5 years?????????
Talk about living in hell. If it's going to be anything like they talked about I don't see how he even agreed to it! I certainly don't see how he can put up with it!!
If everyone already knows about Jumal, and hates his ass, why can't she marry him? Something in pappys will preventing it? Or something in the will that includes him in her marriage? Good old pappy probably said she HAD to marry HIM or forfeit the loot.
What I don't like; Jumal is gonna be a big prick with a 12" dick. Why can't these big dicks be like Forest Tucker.. White and 14".
I like
It's a story with a twist that could have so many different outcomes. Keep going
Very nice start
Well, he's smart and not a wimp. I like that. But she was (almost) honest with him and the crux of the matter is she is paying him to act a role. Lots of different ways to go with this one. Very nice premise.
Great start
to a story, but don't get too excited.
Bob has started out well plenty of times, but usually manages to disappoint those of us who like non wimp stories.
Let's wait until the end to praise him, it might save us the effort as usual.
Great start and a whole lot of possibilities
You've certainly left yourself a lot of wiggle room to go where you will which makes it so interesting. I hope that when the smoke clears Jack has kicked ass and taken names. Ronnie W.
A very believable and true story
This is a great read and an awesome beginning. Gloria thought she had a wimp on her hands, but he struck first. This event got him into her mind of no one to play with. His leg up on her lover gives him more time to be with her. I can see him getting the girl whom he lusted over for years as the maid in the house as his lover. They will drive Gloria crazy when they be making love in another room. Will await other chapters to see how this pans out. I think after 5 years Gloria is going to think of a way to keep him mummmm :()....
A very believable and true story
This is a great read and an awesome beginning. Gloria thought she had a wimp on her hands, but he struck first. This event got him into her mind of no one to play with. His leg up on her lover gives him more time to be with her. I can see him getting the girl whom he lusted over for years as the maid in the house as his lover. They will drive Gloria crazy when they be making love in another room. Will await other chapters to see how this pans out. I think after 5 years Gloria is going to think of a way to keep him mummmm :()....
good story Bob
but why make the other man a nigger? Christ don't we have enopugh of that racial shit on this site? I don't think it added to the story at all.
It's going to be rough for us readers.
This starts off well with a strong-willed man. He knows what he is getting into and has accepted it. Although JPB has shown the man to be a wimp concerning his last relationship. This guy should just act like this is a job and clock in and out as necessary. He should be fucking his "maid" as often as possible to keep his own (and the readers) sanity.
He should have added the requirement that Jumal had to be clean and remain monogamous throughout the five years (for health purposes) or the money and the deal was forfeit immediately.
Since JPB has only had one husband that remained strong-willed in his dozens of stories, I am not putting too much faith into this one. I only hope I am wrong.
Great story
Great story Bob I really enjoyed it, I hope the husband will end up the winner in this one. I think he really likes Gloria and I think this is what her dad wanted for her was these two together.
Last Laugh
I think our body Jack isn't going to be your typical cockolded husband. He is going to be able to have his cake And eat it to, so to speak, with a nice between meal appitizer (Sally Ann).
going to be awesome
This series is going to be awesome. With this beginning, your greatest risk is letting it run too long and becoming predictable. I loved the part about "some group that wants to save whales, hug trees or secure habitat for some goddamned mouse".
Proceed! This is a truly innovative story line. I'm looking forward to the next chapter.
-- KVK
re: "Great Start by DeadWould"
Personally, I think you'll be pleased. The entire story has already appeared on another site, and I feel it is one of JPB's better pieces, with twists that held my interest. Some of the speculations are rather close, but I won't say which ones.
All in all, a very interesting story.
great potential
(wonder where the story was already posted..hehe)
someone mentioned my main quibble: " I don't care for the part where he chooses an aquantinces' wife to be the maid/sex partner. If he is so loyal, and has good morals, values then why would he stoop to having sex with someone else's wife?"
This is where the story got a little weak IMHO. He's experienced it in the past with an ex gf, yet wants to do some wife of a guy he knows? Hard to believe. I also wonder about the kid aspect... hope that comes out as I'd have a hard time making a kid I'd then never see and would be raised by a scheming biatch and arsehole lover. So while I like the main character, there is enough to dislike about all the main players here.
A great start
JPB is one of those authors that doesn't make me mad with his wimp cuckold stories (except one). Maybe it is the way he writes them?
I have hope that this story will be kick ass, and that Jack will not let himself be treated like a doormat.
Cheers!
Go bOb gO!
cool! a lot of fun to read! nice story... i hope some more chapters cumming..
Thanks for the tip Anon in NJ
I found it.
I usually pass over Bob's stuff because of his wimpy men and plot lines too unbelievable.
This one seems good - maybe he has been building up to this standard. Now he has a level to maintain.
We can but hope.
The start was great, the husband smart and cool
The problem some have with it, choosing a friend's wife to be his sex slave really isn't there. I mean, he knew from looking at the book that the woman was already willing to whore. It's not as if he was suborning her or anything. Hell, he already knows she fucks for money, or at least has agreed to it. And she has no idea, as far as he knows, whose slut she will be.
My biggest scrupple is the asshole lover. But if this guy is a smart as JPB paints him the asshole will get his very soon.
Good, but could have been better
This story needs a continuation. She needs to end up with a rounded tummy after the wedding night fiasco. Then perhaps the marriage will continue with him deciding the course of it, with the intended spouse losing out in the long run.
Out-frigging-standing!
Bob has a deft touch at scene and character, though I'll admit I don't usually go for doormat cuck stories. This bit, though, was impressive enough to pull me along despite 5 years of potential hell for the protagonist. If Bob can keep the momentum here, I see a cross-genre award winner.
Loved the ending...very fitting
Great little story.... hope you write more about this "marriage" could be interesting!
Just Desserts
I am really enjoying the way the story is playing out, in fact I hope it Jack can keep it going like this the whole time. I mean he really doesn't have to try hard to fuck with the boyfriend's head so that should keep em on even ground. Every time he says something he can just come back and humiliate him at the same time. I hope the next chapter comes out soon.
Wonders never cease
Only JPB can write a story where serial cheating, date rape, gangbangs, degradation and deception all mix together in an intriguing brew to produce a wonderful story. If only Bob could manage this more often... sigh.
Well done and an entertaining read. Thank you, Just Plain Bob, for a story well told.
Wow!
What a surprise. This story is well conceived and executed. Please continue!
Just Plain Excellent
An intriguing plot plus great characterization makes this the best of JPB's stories. The only downside is that he hasn't produced more stories just like this one.
i was expecting a long story
just finished the third chapter.
I was thinking, if the third chapter had more pages.
it finished too quickly.
After reading first few para of the first chapter, i expected current finishing and i got my expecting finishing. But entering of sally ann made me confuse, may be this story going to another way. but when i know she is married, then i was almost sure about the finishing.
"I'm not going to explain why I can't marry my lover"
I think, writer also don't know why. He needed a character, who was good as lover, but not as husband. I think, though Gloria loved him blindly, but she had some suspicious into her unconscious mind.
love the story. as the story really short and have few errors, i am giving 4 out of 5.
I don't know if I will like this story or not.
However, it is very creative and original and not implasible so I gave it 5 Stars.
Don't we just pity Jumal. So far he is not going to be pleased. Therefore, hopefully he will dump her.
Very Well Written
However, as good as the story is, parts of it are hard to swallow (pun intended). Being that I'm not into eating cream pies, those parts of the story are a major turn off. Although, the rest of the plot is pure genius.
Excellent work.
Very good humorous stoy all 3 chapters
I am glad JPB achived good level among the humorous stories.
How could a smart Potemkin husband smuggle his DNA to a rich family. Ha,ha,ha.....
5 stars
I forgot.
I have serious problems
With any "straight" guy that eats another's cum out of his wife that is simply disgusting and degrading. I immediately lose respect for any character involved. Honestly the only character in this story I liked was the charity guy as he was the least dishonest out of this whole fucked up bunch, I will say you have a penchant for slightly irritating yet comical stories JPB as always peace and keep up the writing as long as it's your desire to.
Why
Why, if Gloria is hiring a maid/escort for Jack, does he need to eat Gloria's pussy that is full of Jumal's juice, or do any of the rest of the degrading stuff planned.
Just an FYI
You're not the only one who makes this mistake, but I finally decided that I had to start telling folks when I see it: the word "discrete" means "distinct, individual, singular"...while "discreet" means "showing discernment or good judgment, unnoticeable, unobtrusive".
You want to use "discreet" in your story. Otherwise, it's pretty good, and worth the four stars I voted you.
Some how I never got around to commenting on this one!
So far a good story, though the fact that Gloria planned on pulling a fast one irritates and bodes little good for the future. The creampies will irritate everyone but I am sure that there is some sort of win in here for the protagonist.. Please Bob!
Interesting Start
Okay she bought herself a husband. Now can she remain faithful to her boyfriend?
HA Ha ha
On to ch.2.
Excellent beginning
I like this guy. He has the making of someone with chops. A big plus? He's SMART!
And an excellent ending!
But for some reason JPB didn't allow comments on chapters 2 and 3????? But read this one. It has a GOOD ending (thanks to Bob for an ending), wonderful characters and some clever dialogue. One of Bob's best!
The Pretzel Twist
Bob needs to twist the story into knots to get to what he really wants:
A cuckolded man who has to eat the cum of some black asshole. That he gets a piece of pussy is besides the point. Since this cum eating has shown up several times in his story, it must be a personal fetish. That's fine. It doesn't do anything to me.
What IS engaging in this story is some of the twists and turns in the plot. For me it is the plot. For Bob, it is the slurping.
It would have pointless for her to say: Hi...I have an asshole lover. I will marry and fuck you once or twice, but I will DISCRETELY and PRIVATELY get my ashes hauled with him and you will NEVER see him. You get some escorts and some cash out of the deal.
See how simple that was? But there was no cum slurping goodness, ergo, the Pretzel.
don't know
I would be very likely to have gone for an annulment at the first sign she was not keeping the deal, if she'll screw you over on the first day, what would make you believe she would honor the rest of the deal ?
OverTheFalls
It appears that JPB is a scummy little prick. His use of the "N" word, several times in the remaining chapters, though in line with general attitudes of LW authors and readers, may have caused some unappreciated comments.
Robert
Enjoyed it
a little creepy, but well done. Thanks.
Hey searching, are you a nigger ? See, I use the expression too and I am not an author.
I must say,It's very appropriate and descriptive. The story? It's arguably one of the best on Lit. Wonderful effort JPB !
5***** .
otoh
Wonder how much of that $10,000 a month spending money a reasonably careful man could sock away in a safe deposit box or some other hiding place without failing to keep up appearances?
Something to make up a nice little "This isn't working" fund.
Goes along with him having a guaranteed job for life, and what would she pay to get out of that?
She has already tried to shaft him on the wedding day, five years with someone who is not even willing to keep to the letter of their agreement for one day is unlikely to work.
Re-read This
So what we have here is a contract, not a marriage. I liked the way our hero fucked up her start and she actually liked it. More than she wanted to. Time now to follow the contract.
*****
Great start - he has his bases covered.
Think she doesn't realize what she "married". 😎
damn, running out of other hands
Under the full disclosure part of the contract the attempt to shaft him on the wedding day was not in good faith.
All he needed was the threat of a good lawyer to get the $2.5 million without the wait.
Great
This story (all 3 parts) is one of my all-time favorites.
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