Miss Kiss

More!

i hope you continue this story, it is the best of any iv ever read on here! Please do continue it!!!

A nice sweet story

I agree with the previous comment. This one deserves a sequal. Ronnie W.

once again the best

had to say i came back white wrabbitt

A Sweet, Sexy Girl

The great thing about Scouries' writing and the women in his writings is that they are the kind of sweet, sexy girls that every guy wants to fall for. Well done!

Nookiehunter

Great and beautiful

This was a really good story but I have one complaint. I loved the story and the premise but it seems that you sort of rushed the ending. You know, the whole kiss kiss smooch smooch and sex. It was a beautiful story though. Please continue with writing and add a little more about their kid. Did they get married? What happened? Very suspenseful.

......Envious.......

....Once knew a gal like her.....mmm mmm mmm

Great work but -

As always this is a great story and fun to read. I have read everything you have posted and can't get enough. I am especially fond of the stories like "Swimming with the Dolphins." I do have one comment that I hope you will take as well meant constructive criticism. Here is a quote from your work and an example of what my concern.

"Well Doctor Kiss, I believe that's better left between Miss Lucy and I."

Properly, compounds with a proper name and a pronoun act as if there were only the pronoun alone. They can be the subject, direct object, or object of a preposition, etc. To identify easily (and without fooling around studying the grammar) whether to use 'I or me', 'he or him', 'she or her' simply leave out the proper noun and the word 'and'. In the quote of yours would you say, "Well Doctor Kiss, "I believe that's better left between (we or us)." Other examples are: Give Lucy and I/me the money; check it by saying 'Give I/me the money'. Also 'This room was designed for Judy and I/me.' Check it using only 'This room was designed for I/me?

Your work is great; I can't approach it, but I do hope this comment will be helpful for you.

Loved It

I really love the way you write!!!

Don't criticize the grammar; just read and enjoy.

I was just about through with the first page and out of beer. So, I cracked open another one ready to read a couple more pages. And, quickly, there was a weekend of beautiful sex, a six month old child, and all the elements of more good reading....and it was over. No complaints, you understand, I enjoy all of Jim's stories, but it was just a surprise, stopping at that point. Now I have a full beer and the story's over. Oh, well, I'm reading all of Jim's stories, and I'm just on the Ms, so I guess I'll start another. That's not so bad, now is it - getting to read two of Jim's jewels in one night! Thanks, Jim Scouries, for bringing such enjoyable fare to our table.

Ummmmm

I just love happy endings!

No wonder...

I see now why you stick to Incest primarily. This story sucked as a Romance. Hell, it would've sucked in Erotic Couplings or even Mature. Where the hell did you learn how to write? With your claims on the message boards of "sex and lots of it" you were seriously lacking in this story. Two paragraphs? Seriously? How come you don't promote this story on the boards? Are you ashamed to have a Romance story listed in your story page? Well, with this garbage, you should be ashamed. Leave the Romance to the REAL writers on this site and stick to the less than mediocre stroke you claim to be so good at.

haha a one pager

i liked it. dont bother with those haters. they just dont know how to just enjoy themselves. write anything you want. ill read it.

wonderful and tasteful

Your stories are so well written, you paint a picture with words that transports you right into the story as if you are there. Keep up the good work, I to will read anything you write. craving for more.

Another issue

Hi scouries,
Why did you do 'We spent hours just staring into the others eyes, while gently caressing with our hands the other's cheeks, lips, neck and hair' Why didn't 'the other's cheeks' trigger you to go back and change the earlier bit to 'the other's eyes'?

An editor cringes at that sort of mistake - but can still admire your creativity. linmhall@gmail.com if you're still writing.

first off, ignore the posters who just want to hug box you to death, they won't let you improve at all.

second, miss toxic kiss? are you kidding everyone with that stupid name?

third, you describe her eyes as being very dark, yet call them luminous pools in the next section. please make up your mind

Too short and not enough detail --

What we have here is the stub of a story. It's a good stub and written well for what it is. It has a setup and a sort of a climax but nothing else. That makes it much too short.

The are lots of places where scouries could have gone farther -- the prostitute, the tendency for the student to be a submissive slut, the age difference, many others. However none of these is developed. The characters are shallow. There is no developed conflict.

I gave it 4 stars for the good writing, but that's probably too high.