Make me wait, and you get a rotten vote. This segment was entirely too short.
by
Anonymous06/23/05
booooo!
Did you write this in 5 minutes? Don't write a sequel if it's going to me lame like this.
by
Anonymous06/23/05
not very good
what is it with you writers isn't there any real male writers who like women who have breasts? i;ve only read a handful of stories that have women with breasts yours was not one of them. i found boreing and totaly lacking any originality.
by
Anonymous06/26/05
Short!
Well written, so far... Please, don't give us teasers; finish the story...
by
Anonymous06/27/05
More details, slow down the plot
Moves to easily from, 'Let visit a nude beach' to 'Man, you make me horny!' Well, duh? I didn't see that coming. Kind of short, not enough tension or anxiety between the characters over their first nude outing. Keep trying.
English
Needs a few more chapters
Make me wait, and you get a rotten vote. This segment was entirely too short.
booooo!
Did you write this in 5 minutes? Don't write a sequel if it's going to me lame like this.
not very good
what is it with you writers isn't there any real male writers who like women who have breasts? i;ve only read a handful of stories that have women with breasts yours was not one of them. i found boreing and totaly lacking any originality.
Short!
Well written, so far... Please, don't give us teasers; finish the story...
More details, slow down the plot
Moves to easily from, 'Let visit a nude beach' to 'Man, you make me horny!' Well, duh? I didn't see that coming. Kind of short, not enough tension or anxiety between the characters over their first nude outing. Keep trying.
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