All Comments on 'Execution in 750 Words'

Weak story until the last two sentences made the whole story come alive. Thanks for sharing.

That was funny. Clever little plot twist. I guess she picked the wrong man to tell the world she was still alive. But what life can she have? Hiding in the shadows, fearing someone will recognize her and it might be her turn to fry? Well played.

That was a great short story that you could easily turn into a much longer one. A lot going on with a very bad man being executed for a crime he didn't commit. You have the "dead" wife watching him die on tv, and the bartender , with his own checkered past, avoiding the fame the "dead" woman offered him. You could, if you desired, take off with this. Great work.

since it is over let it lie down and be buried, TK U MLJ LV NV

murder done legally

Outstanding. Didn't see the end coming.

Different

It's difficult to tell a story in few words.

Has to be done with thought and planning.

This story told a lot, with a strong plot

and good writing.

Top ratings from me.

Clever. Made me smile. *****

clever, very clever. Really well-paced and well-done. In this story, death is a literary device, no one is actually wearing a toe tag, so relax. The surprise ending is what made this one memorable.

And told well in the constraints of the 750 word frame.

There were multiple themes, too, which all worked well.

This is a well written story. No excessive explanation, just enough fact and enough suggestion to get the job done. Masterful!

R.

This story is an example of what can be done with 750 words. Good job.

Yes, he was a bastard, but just like people say that cheating isn't a capital offense, neither is being a bastard.

*****

Never saw that one coming

She will find another way to let them all know. Her husband got what he deserved.

Creative. One nit-not "pardon", but "commute". A pardon wouldn't happen at that point, but the death sentence might be commuted. Also, with no body, no conviction for murder 1

I liked it 5* worth.

Knew who she was from the beginning; saw where it was going by the middle. The twist at the end was a nice surprise. Well done.

Well written and a nice twist at the end. Well done! 5*

without knowing what really happened it is hard to judge the wife or her husband

makes you wonder how many times innocent people were persecuted

good story but kind of leaves you numb

guess i ll leave the rating the same you left me NUMBerless

750 words to the point!

If such a word exists? 5 stars, no problem.

Did not see that very end coming.

Nicely done.

"without knowing what really happened it is hard to judge the wife or her husband" - The prisoner beat up the woman in the bar. Possibly with the help of her sister she faked her death, and her sister pushed for her husband's execution.

Once it was too late, she gave the bartender evidence that she was, indeed alive.

Luckily for her, the bartender preferred to remain anonymous, or she could be facing a wrongful death lawsuit and/or criminal conspiracy charges, once it became known that she was, indeed alive.

Lovely twist at the end, making it two who don't want to be found.

We’re are all the violence hating cuckolds on the death of an innocent man. I’ll tell you where, at home sucking the cum out of her fouled cunt.

By the way, 4......she should have sent the Governor, the press and the DA a video of her laughing her ass off.

I love your imagination. Saw something quite similar many years ago.

Keep writing.

T.T.

Hard to do more in 750 words than that.

Need I say more?

5*.

Loved it! Great little tale!

First off, 5 stars! Thanks for sharing AlexanderT, but 750 words were just the starting point of this intriguing story. What this story needs is a prequel. That would be quite a challenge for any writer. Instead, of a follow-up story, an open prequel challenge to this story would be interesting.

I've read a lot of your comments and not once do I remember a comment from you where you were critical of the husband or called him a name when he took even the most extreme BTB on a cheating wife and/or her lover. Even when she or the lover were killed, maimed, etc.

Yet in this story we know, or can assume, that she was severely physically abused by her husband (facial scars), was caused to be raped multiple times or caused to be gangraped by her husband (tied up and he let his friendS fuck her), and was psychologically abused by that same husband (bringing home other women to be screwed by him in front of her) and for her getting revenge on him, or not even revenge but to get protection from a monster like that, you call her a "Bitch"? All those things don't make him merely a "bastard"; at least the first two are criminal and could/should result in long prison sentences.

What caused you to hate women so much? Are you gay and were not able to live out your gay lifestyle? Was it that you were constantly rejected by women? Or was it that your wife/gf left you for a better man?

And well written 5*

Even if he wasn’t guilty of murder he was guilty of a whole lot that he should pay for. As for the society of barmen, what goes on between drinker and server, stays with the barman, end of. 5* for an entertaining little flash.

Where are you when the twilight zone needs you. 5*

thank you

But the bartender was a douche.

Doesn't matter, she'll just do it again at another bar. Or maybe just send her prints to the DA. Seems she wants some jail time too.

...spencerfiction said it better than I could... 5 stars, Thanx!

Loklie

Well It Looks she got fuck in the end or was it in the bar?

Why was the bartender a douche? He had something to hide too. If the.lady wants to make herself known , she can do so in many other ways.

I don't think the bartender was a douche.

By the time he knew, he couldn't save the guy, he couldn't even prove that he got the glass after she was supposedly dead (though why he would have saved it otherwise would be hard to explain!).

In any case, he obviously had his own reasons for wanting to stay anonymous.

Now, if he could have saved the guy, I'd agree with you.

Well written, original, and a clever twist. Thanks for this story. 5*s

While I don't mind the bastard getting burned, fried is a little much. Still, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do...

GA

Go fuck yourself , you homophobic motherfucker. Learn to insult someone without calling them "gay". Fucking trash.

Nice story. It was obvious to me that the woman was the abused wife. Didn't expect that she would out herself. Lets her in for possible arrest and prosecution for framing her husband for a crime he didn't commit. Classic case of a guilty party who can't keep her mouth shut. Should have taken it to her grave.

I was expecting her to make some statement such as "many who are guilty are never punished, then there are those who get what they deserve."

When the bartender tells us she has scars, and then she lists the condemned man's list of wrongs against her, it became obvious that she was the wife. I think to throw off the reader a bit when she first came into the bar the bartender could have said something to the effect that somehow she looked familiar. That he must have seen her amongst the group of women protesters outside of the prison who had been part of domestic abuse support group, or a group that lobbies for tougher crime on abusive men.

That would have explained the facial scars, and her strong interest in the particulars of the case and strong emotional aversion to the condemned man.

Also, you could have let the readers know who she was at the end in a different way. It doesn't make sense why she would tell the bartender to let the detectives know she was still alive. Why would she care so much that the detectives know what she did? After all obviously she never interacted with the detectives herself. She would want the dickhead husband know what she did to him, but of course he already knew he didn't kill her. It would make more sense she would want his friends who raped her know what she did to him (because they could never be 100% sure that he didn't actually kill her no matter how many times he protested to them that he didn't do it), or those (like his family maybe) that always backed him against her while he was abusing her. So maybe another line or two about who her target actually was in letting the world know what she did to him.

short story.

I enjoyed it.

5*

There seems to be some belief that Sweetie committed a crime. Maybe (even Probably) she did set Hubby up ... but is there evidence of that? Probably not! Simply not coming forward is not, I think, a crime in any US state. I agree with the nit which was picked that without a body* it would not be an death-penalty crime!

The bartender’s reason (never clarified except for suggesting marital) for not wanting to be exposed is unlikely to have any link to the execution crime. As pointed out in other comments, Sweetie has a lot of ways to maintain some privacy while exposing the government acting in error to Fry Her Bastard. That may fry some elected officials ... and maybe enhance Sister’s Top 40 future. Why she would want to discredit the justice system is also unclear. If she did effect a set-up her most likely reason would seem to be punishing Hubby ...without endangering herself & terminally!

5*

* or sufficient evidence that disposal of a human body was performed ... such as finding enough of a victim’s blood at the scene that survival was impossible.

Were this anything but fiction, I'd hope she dies screaming. Never like to see people convicted of crimes that never happened, by the conniving of cowardly filth.

You want him dead, kill him yourself. Don't use the criminal justice system to do it for you.

@ Anonymous..your a 100% correct.

Yeah. So she can be arrested and spend time in jail. Then spend every last penny paying fighting imprisonments in court. Using the justice system that let her be tied up, raped, and beaten. Sure. Maybe they lived in the country so there was no one to hear screaming, so you couldn’t technically blame the system for not coming to her rescue, but how the hell is she going to get justice or revenge within the “system”? Then in the end, if she loses the court battle, she goes to prison for several years. And if she wins she doesn’t have a penny to her name and lives on government subsides. And will undoubtedly suffer PTSD for years, decades even.

And she “escaped” from confinement. If she had comeback to physically assault her husband, maybe she’d 5’2”, and after confinement weighs in at 88lbs. And hubby was 6’4”. And regardless of what weight, far stronger than she is.

And maybe he was rich or connected. She knew the good ol’ boy network and enough money would allow hubby out on bail, and would give him a slap on the wrist even if found guilty.

“Yeah. Do it yourself.” She’s using, or abusing, the system to get HER JUSTICE in one of the only ways she can.

And don’t get me started about Death Penalty, racial bias, gender bias, rich peoples advantages of the system, dirty prosecutors, incompetent public defenders, and dirty police forces. The death penalty is used incorrectly in the US, but a tiny abused whisp of woman was able, here, to use it for her own justice.

Brilliant execution all round, 5/5 x

Reading a few of your other stories makes it very difficult to believe that you wrote something this good.

Yup good one… wish more of these bastards who maim hurt and torture for sexual pleasure get executed.. I’d prefer if they could be buried alive with their victims being the one to put the first bulldozer of mud on them! Best justice .. Wild West style

Loved it. 5***** While I saw the ending coming, it was the short journey that I enjoyed along with the terrific idea.

I come back to this story every now and again, it gets better every read.

My take? Barkeep is the worst kind of human evil. The ignorant shrug in the face of injustice.

LOL or great

Many of us have scars on the outside and inside. That comment about wives needing discipline pissed me right the fuck off.

Agree 100% You never wanna be famous you just wanna be RICH!!!! 5 stars!

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Outstanding!

She got the revenge but the infamy still awaits. The protesters outside the gate are having their fun, why deprive the gal on the other side of the question of her fun?

AND - he doesn't want that ex-wife of his to find out where he's hiding ......

She ain’t dead, but he must have really damaged her for that level of hatred.

Damn! Great story, Alexander, thanks. Just so many different directions this one could go. 😆

Five stars, without a doubt.

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