Brittany Gets a Birthday Present

Started as 100

dropped to 75 with the 36D, dropped to 50 with the 8' extra large, dropped to 00 with the anal.

Well done

Enjoyed this throughly dont worry about other comments you have great syle more please

HOT, HOT, HOT!!

Well writem, no longer pay attention to giant dicks in stories. The comment about rape was over the top. It's too literal. Sis never said no to him.

Poorly Done

I hope you do not plan writing anymore stories in the near future. Your body sized items do not fit the passage and is a big turn off. I wish you would have used something becides "white cotton panties"- very boring but I would agree that your detail is otherwise excellent.

I think mentioning that you were under 21 and drinking is also just pretty boring, I wish you would have left that out- it would of made the story a little more sexy- as in just a "not really accually feeling there sober" kind of moment.

Thank you.
-MA

Not bad, but I do have to agree...

with some of the previously comments. You completely MISused the word rape, not a pretty or seductive word to be used when it doesn't apply, and OVERused "cotton panties", in the extreme. While I am well aware that cotton panties can be a big turn-on for some people, sometimes to the point of being a fetish...even they would tell you to give it a rest. Your writing need variety, imagination, and creativity. Don't give up, just put more time & effort into your stories, have someone you trust and who has good judgment to read it & give you some constructive critism before you post it. My opinion, take it or leave it...your choice.

I don't care what the others......

I don't care what the others had to say. That can be my birthaday present everyday of the week. I enjoyed your story. I read for entertainment, I rate every story and I believe it takes a lot for someone to write this kind of story wether it be true or false. We are old enough to know when she said to fuck me she wasn't being raped. Come on pepole just enjoy the stories, send the nasty stuff, bad spelling, wrong terminology to the author.

great present

Wish I had someone like that in my life to give me such a great birthday present. the person that said ur rating started at a 100 and then dropped to a 0 and criticized everything, must have a small dick to be upset that u put the brother's size at 8". It was a good story and yes, have someone edit for u, but other than that i enjoyed it. Good luck and hope to read more from u.

Damn HOT Story MORE PLEASE!!!!!

I Really enjoyed the story, it seemed to be a true one...
I don't care about the other comments. I LOVED IT!!! It did leave me wanting MORE, so please have more chapters. I think you have the gift.
Thank you

Enjoyed this story very much!

Regardless of the first couple of comments, you did a good job with this. It's funny that most of the bad comments are always "anonymous"!!!
Sure wish I had a younger sister that I could give a birthday present like that!!! Or even and older sister to give me one like that!!

could be better

I agree with some of the other comments the cotton panties thing over done after saying it once u should have just said panties. the rape thing was way wrong not the right word to use and should never be used for something u both concented to and lastly the 8' cock and anal please so ober the top. fix all that and it could be ok.

Great first story

Ignore the critics and notice that they are almost always anonymous or have never posted a story themselves. Your story was interesting and was very arousing for me. I hope you continue to write. Well done first effort!

Bob

Too Far!

Why is every writer so hung up about ass fucking? It didn't do anything for your story!!!!!

VERY HOT

First time writing and you start off with a bang. I was very impressed. Just keep them coming...wonder what dad gave her for her birthday...just a thought...

fucked not raped

good story, nice plot, and sexy.
the word fucked, rammed, slammed, or banged, but not raped.
keep up the good work
d' count

ass fucking again?

I loved your story, but I don't think the ass fucking part was necessary. Other than that, it was one hot fucking story. Keep up the good work, and keep em cumming.

Enjoyed this

I really enjoyed this story. THere seemed to be a ring of truth about it. Was there?

SO HOT

Wow....bro/sis ...very hot and sexy story......can't wait to read more of your postings.........

A Good Start!

A super birthday present! Despite the obviously consensual sex, her constant use of the term 'rape' makes me think that she felt a little uneasy about her brother 'taking her'. Keep up the good work.

BRAVO!!!

This was one hot story.

Sexy Story

Very hot! My brother was 21 when I turned 18 but we never did this for my birthday. :) What a delicious fantasy! Thanks for sharing.

Thanks for letting him squirt!

You had me nervous (and horny) there for for a minute when sister passed out after that huge orgasm--I thought poor brother would not get to cum. But you let him blast his load in the end. Very nice! Keep it up!

--AddToWater

i loved it!!

my brother fucked me for my birthday when i turned 18 but he was 19. i loved your story and i can totally relate to it. good job!!

I wish I had a brother! That made me so hot! I'm now going to find a real cock to abuse me!

rape is not a synonym for fuck

Your writing is really, really hot. Every single time you use the word "rape" I turn totally cold.

you use the word 'fucking' too much.... itt kinda ruins the story when you you have a variation of 'fuck' in one out of five sentences.

do you know the meaning of the word "rape"? Ithink not. you don't.

Inexperienced

People who have clearly never experienced anal should not be allowed to write about it. Done correctly, as described here, it does NOT hurt! I'm tired of seeing this ignorance bring used to ruin what could be a good story.

Crap

The story was going along alright until it went anal which put it in the wrong category and totally ruined the story. Gave it a 1 vote then moved on to another writer. I gave this story the consideration it deserved, none.
The old fart