All Comments on 'Iona Online Ch. 11'

That was certainly quick...I'm used to chapters being longer, having more material to present, etc., so the brevity of this, and the others before it, have come as somewhat a surprise. Not sure what criteria you use to determine chapter length, but perhaps changing it for future chapters to make them longer?

On another note, I was half expecting Sara to make some comment about Kari. Surely what Michael did to her was more significant than enchanting a weapon, even if he was the first to do so?

Don't get me wrong, I like the story and gave 5 stars. I understand not every story on here can be "Three Square Meals" length and depth. Seems like all of your "Iona Online" chapters have been coming out very fast paced but all have been on the short side.

IDK if you're posting as you write or if you're doling out an already or mostly finished story. This is chapter 11... it should really be more like the end of chapter 3. With the protagonist intro, meet the tribe, fight the spiders, training being chapters 1 and 2. Escape, travel the woods, save Kari, fight bear, get goddess warning is a good chapter 3.. even ends with a cliffhanger! lol

I'm not saying you should write fluff or filler either but several scenes could have been longer with more character development. Like why was the club trainer deliberately trying to kill? Maybe add a scene from his trial where he explains himself.

Anyway, these are just my opinions on how you could make a good story so much better. Take care and keep writing please. :D

This story is based on a genre that I love (fantasy) so when fly past these short chapters it leaves me shaking my head. You have so much to describe, including the way Michael thinks bjt because this is so short theres a gab blocking the bridge between what you've tried to show and our imagination as the viewer. Please put more effort into making these chapters ALOT longer. Thank you for the story so far though.

Very much enjoying the series so far!

While I wouldn't mind longer chapters (and a bit more smut), I am very much enjoying the quick release schedule.

Write at whatever pace and length makes you happy and keeps you going. I feel like I could happily read a few hundred chapters of the world you're building.