homeNon-Erotic Poetryhouse of blue gablesPublic Comments

All Comments  for

house of blue gables

bybluerains©
All
Comments (4)
by Anonymous

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Du Lac07/31/05

*

Your poem was mentioned in the Sunday Reviews
du lac~

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by twelveoone07/31/05

*

Here it is very unclear, what I am reading is "tequila mocking birds" it looks like a puncuation error, I like the idea of "tequila mocking birds"
as familiar
as tequila mocking birds
tap, tap, tapping
rhythmic roof tunes (say this line)

I would shorten this: use line breaks to advantage, word I would take out is "metropolis" doesn't seem add anything

play to each metropolis
every plaza, dwelling and
town


Great lines here:
they park their hammers
and blow taps
in our public pubs

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Anonymous07/31/05

colorful opening...

surprised a little at the end. More down to earth than
some of your recent works. I liked it. sand

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by My Erotic Tale07/31/05

excellent

I just love this poem, it felt like a song...

hammers to beating sun...masterful vision
bows humble (~_~)

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.

Click here to leave your own comment on this submission!  or
Back to house of blue gables  or
More submissions by bluerains.

Add a
Comment

Post a public comment on this submission.

Post comment as (click to select):

Preview comment

Forgot your password?

Please wait

Change picture

Your current user avatar, all sizes:

Default size User Picture  Medium size User Picture  Small size User Picture  Tiny size User Picture

You have a new user avatar waiting for moderation.

Select new user avatar:

   Cancel