so I can't comment on your literacy or if you are using correct tense, all I know is I look forward to your new submissions and you are my favorite Author
by
Anonymous08/23/05
Fun and hot!
Funny and hot fantasy! It would have been funny with a final twist, like Peter cumming by mistake inside Courtney, without protection. Next lesson would have been "maternity" ;-)
by
Anonymous08/24/05
Bad English
There is nothing that ruins a good story as much as the poor use of the English language. Bad spelling, using the wrong tenses and using words such as "they're" instead of "their" totally ruined my enjoyment of this story. Take a course in English and then let's see what you can do because you probably do have the makings of a good author if only you took more care.
by
Anonymous08/24/05
Awesome
Great Story, oh and just one thing. Why would some people look at the grammar of a sex story? Seriously constructive critisim or not i dont see the point of ur complaints.
I think it is a great story. The grammar does detract from some of the enjoyment of the story because the reader has to pause sometimes to figure out what is trying to be conveyed. A third party editor would help immensely. I would be happy to edit your next story if you would like.
by
08/27/05
loved it
Hey
I don't care what anyone says this is a good story. Wish my highschool sexed class was like that. Can't wait to see what happens next. Maybe Ms rice can get in for a little "teacher assistance".
by
Anonymous12/15/05
Come on!
Give me at least a glimpse of realism!
by
Anonymous01/31/07
Great Story..forget what everyone else says
Hey this was a killer story!!! I don't care what all those other anal bastards said about grammar. This story is really incredible and I liked the fact that it was as far from realistic as possible!
Unfortunately, there were a few too many grammatical errors to fully enjoy the story. Mistakes in grammar are annoying like receiving the wrong amount of change from a purchase. You have to stop and figure out what was wrong with that sentence or word, and it stops the flow of the story. However, one of the mistakes has earned you another star. - "Dark hair completely covered his udder and middle back." - Priceless
English
gee
You're still semi-literate and barely decipherable. Reserve roles? Weaken body? Learn tenses please.
I'm no English teacher
so I can't comment on your literacy or if you are using correct tense, all I know is I look forward to your new submissions and you are my favorite Author
Fun and hot!
Funny and hot fantasy! It would have been funny with a final twist, like Peter cumming by mistake inside Courtney, without protection. Next lesson would have been "maternity" ;-)
Bad English
There is nothing that ruins a good story as much as the poor use of the English language. Bad spelling, using the wrong tenses and using words such as "they're" instead of "their" totally ruined my enjoyment of this story. Take a course in English and then let's see what you can do because you probably do have the makings of a good author if only you took more care.
Awesome
Great Story, oh and just one thing. Why would some people look at the grammar of a sex story? Seriously constructive critisim or not i dont see the point of ur complaints.
Editing
I think it is a great story. The grammar does detract from some of the enjoyment of the story because the reader has to pause sometimes to figure out what is trying to be conveyed. A third party editor would help immensely. I would be happy to edit your next story if you would like.
loved it
Hey
I don't care what anyone says this is a good story. Wish my highschool sexed class was like that. Can't wait to see what happens next. Maybe Ms rice can get in for a little "teacher assistance".
Come on!
Give me at least a glimpse of realism!
Great Story..forget what everyone else says
Hey this was a killer story!!! I don't care what all those other anal bastards said about grammar. This story is really incredible and I liked the fact that it was as far from realistic as possible!
Great story!!
Grammar
Unfortunately, there were a few too many grammatical errors to fully enjoy the story. Mistakes in grammar are annoying like receiving the wrong amount of change from a purchase. You have to stop and figure out what was wrong with that sentence or word, and it stops the flow of the story. However, one of the mistakes has earned you another star. - "Dark hair completely covered his udder and middle back." - Priceless
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