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English
We've all been here
This could be me or you or anyone. We've all been here, whether we really waited or not. Nice!
but the magic...
...never really wears off. The memory fades to become more bearable, like that of pain does. but still it lurks, awaiting it's reawakening...
Good imagery
You have a lot of good imagery and descriptions here, a vivid experience. IMO, it's a bit prosey. I think you could really make the poem pop by paring it down to be more concise. There are no guidelines for free verse, of course, but sometimes less is more.
Oh!
I know this feeling. The one where you are there, so very much there physically, yet file it away for emotional processing later. And waiting. Will it happen again? Or will some freaky thought keep him away? Are you safe to revel in it fully, or should you hold back. I can't say it as well as you have, but I know this feeling. Thanks, LJ.
sincere feelings....
I might use fewer words, especially non-essential linking words to thrust home the power of this poem.
~
I tend to like stuff that uses very few words. My writing tends to go that way. I've read 'Chosen' three times now and don't see any words that don't need to be there.
nice one indeed...
This is funny...it's evocative...it's imaginative, and it's so descriptive. Your power is in your details, and in your imagery, logo. Keep it up, kid!
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