All Comments on 'Bite'

by RhymeFairy

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  • 13 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousover 18 years ago
***************

This is NOT erotic poetry, hell it isn't even poetry.

RhymeFairy you have to look at what you're writing, read it out loud, re read it!

I wanna bite,

sink my teeth in,

deep. Run my wet

tongue, over your

entire body.

This is so cliche, everybody uses phrases like that try and write something new and different ~ PLSS I beg you!

Also you use similar words in all your poems, you could blurr them all into one they are so simillar.

Sorry to be so harsh but as a male poet I would like to see your writing mature, then you can tackle erotica.

M

Jennifer CJennifer Cover 18 years ago
Bite me ~ lol

I read this on your thread

hun, another HOT one! I likes

it alot ~ Nothing like biting

or being bitten Grrrrr ~

Oh and Anonymous, this is not poetry because???

what because you don't like it?

Chill out man, their just words.

I love it hun, but then again

I am a gusher! LMAO

Nice work

~ your smutty buddy Jenn x

J.DoeJ.Doeover 18 years ago
~

I agree with your anonymous friend (without his caustic comments), not your smutty buddy, who by the way is not fostering good poetry from you with her mindless strokes. She is just trying to be your friend and make you feel better, which is fine, but doesn't do anything to help you improve.

With your dogged passion for writing even though you are kicked around and drooled on, you still keep on keeping on. This makes you a poet in mindset and is admirable. Now, your writing on the other hand, needs an overhaul. Skip the fluff poets/threads in the poetry forum if you're serious about wanting to improve your skills. The thread, "Poetry in Progress" would serve you well.

LeBrozLeBrozover 18 years ago
~~

Way to go Jenn ~

Stepped away from my prayers at your altar to render some devotions to your lil smutty buddy ~

Hey RF, ya done good here, like Jenn said;

and as for your anonymous "M" ~ get "religion" <grin>

getting wrapped like a pretzel;

now that's a woman who KNOWS what she wants

another thought - don't do it because it's been "done before?" For those that believe that - quit breathing - it's been done before

Jennifer CJennifer Cover 18 years ago
Jeezz

She's even picking my pc's apart now, you'd think she'd have better things to do! I may be a 'fluff' poet but i'm still qualified to say whether or not I like a poem and I liked the poem.

So If you wanna improve your writing RF stay away from us 'fluff poets and our threads' and participate in the threads 'J Doe' sez you should! Apparently she knows it all.

J.DoeJ.Doeover 18 years ago
~

What makes you think I'm a she, Jennifer C? It doesn't matter either way, my comments would serve RhymeFairy's poetry better and that's why she has public comments open for, now isn't it?

I'm sorry RhymeFairy, please delete this comment as soon as you see it because it isn't in your poem's best interest and I really do care enough to see you ascend in your poetry skill level.

sweet GA peachessweet GA peachesover 18 years ago
OMG, ive been eat.

Y.U.M.M.Y !

now, with that being said, may i let you know, with my lower case i's , mind you, that i rather enjoy your poetry, and the bite, i get ... pun intended. no one person writes the same, if we did, the world would crash and burn into hell just from being merely board to death.

now, go eat a peach ..lol... *winks*

sweet GA peachessweet GA peachesover 18 years ago
FOR THE RECORD...

(LeBroz, You absolutley shake my tree ,and i love it ! )and to add a little something more to this .. if this comment section keeps up, this will be the new hottest poem on lit, lol........ what a damn bite that is .. there would be the cat that ate the canary.. LMAO... and i am sure there is more to cum.

with all my peaches,

*grins*

My Erotic TaleMy Erotic Taleover 18 years ago
J Doe

another grammar police, lauren in disguise? Sounds like her, dont fret the nazi comments, obviously this person has a deep hurt or pain and lost soul and needs something to soothe the soul, like hatred for those that write well and recieve praise? I enjoy your poems RF and so do others, seems some don't like the recognition you have recieved.

Your poem was HOT, HEHEHE Erotic which is what this site is geared for and you do it very well <grin> please continue

AnonymousAnonymousover 18 years ago
****

RF I understand the passion you are trying to hit here with the poem. It has potential and I can feel heat smoldering beneath the words. I am sorry I was not around to help you on one of the FLUFFY useless writers threads that I share on. It does need work and I think you have the emotional makings of a hot erotic poem here. I am going to take it to Chasin Chickens and play with it for you if you do not mind. I hope to let all know that we are serious there just like to laugh also. Art and I IM alot when we work on poems and I would gladly do that with you if you like. Let me know

du~

4degrees4degreesover 18 years ago
rawr

meaty bits

of prosey

fuckwords

make salivary glands

flow like a

wide open faucet

oh hell yes.

Bill DadaBill Dadaover 18 years ago
From another Fluff Poet

Pretty amazing response to your very hot poem. Seems you've touched some very sensitive spot in some people with some rather twisted issues. Whatever. Your poem rocks.

lol, BD

tazz317tazz317over 11 years ago
TASTE NOT....WANT WHAT

try to finish every meal. TK U MLJ LV NV

Anonymous
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