- All
Comments (25) - Add a
Comment - Send
Feedback Send private anonymous feedback to the author (click here to post a public comment instead).
| Literotica Toy Store ADULT TOY & DVD STORE FAST & DISCREET |
Literotica XXX Webcams 24/7 LIVE CAMS - FREE PREVIEW W/AUDIO! |
Literotica Adult Movies STREAMING ADULT MOVIES PAY PER MINUTE |
English
Very Good Start.
Some spelling errors which were annoying.
Good start
I agree, use a spell checker.
Not a bad start...
I liked the start of the story. Couple of rough spots in there with grammer/spelling that detracted from the story. On the whole, I'm looking forward to the next part.
Great Beginning
I really liked your story. Can't wait for part 2,3,etc.
And by the way, I'm not a teacher, so I don't care about the typos. You just keep writing. Thank you.
Agree
Good, Hot. Looking forward to more.
Thanks.
Nice
Excellent starting story, too bad it ended so quickly... perhaps a bit more sexual detail might be good too.
Good
Good start. Get a grammer and spelling checker. Make it longer with more sex.
nice
Not a bad job for the first story. The grammar and typos were kind of a pain and were taking away from the edge of the story but other than that, it was good. Looking forward to the next parts.
"grammer"
Hey 'not a bad start' you said there were some "spelling/grammer" errors. Did you mean "grammar"?
Nice Story.
Great story line.Cannot wait to hear the next chapter(s). Keep up the good work.
Beginnings
What a marvelous foundation you've layed. The door stands open to any variation one can imagine. Please continue. Don't be concerned with the comments of amateur grammarians. You will improve with practice. The story is the thing. It's why we're all here.
Part II?
Please continue! Great beginning to a story. Wonderful set up.
Awesome!!!
This story is amazing, but I guess you're done because it's already 2009. I do agree with others that the spelling and grammar detracted from the story, but don't worry, the story is still leaving me on the edge of my seat...
great story
when is No 2 mmmmm really nice and got me really horny. good on ya.
Good job
A well written erotic story. You had a punctuation problem & I didn't know if you intended to put "Mean" (as at first, Megan wasn't nice to you) or you just forgot to put the "g" in it. You could of gave more details, like whereas Megan went back into a trance. But over all, an erotic story. I want to come back for a Ch. 02 and want to applaud for the continuing of more chapters...
good job
I think you should make more of these
continue, please continue !
I'm ready for the rest of the story now.....
great beginning
ths is a good start to a seemingly great storyline. don't let the grammar and spelling get you down. but, please continue with your writing, I'd love to see more chapters.
Write more!
You're keeping us hanging! When are you going to write the next chapter? This was pretty good!
Keep it up.
Love these kind of hypnosis stories can't wait to see if theres more.
Rated three stars ...
More please.
Aww
Was going for the next chapter, there wasn't one. Then I saw it's been 7 years since this was posted. :(
Why
Label a story Chapter 1 when you could leave it blank and Number the next Chapters
It is sad...
I Agree. I hate it when I run into a story that catches my interest and then just leaves me hanging. Maybe we need a writer who finds these old hanging stories and then finishes them. Any takers?
Yeah!
Cletis there is a writer who calls himself "FinishTheDamnStory" but he said he is Back Logged. the shame is this writer has a good story going with a lot of Potential. think of the Girl's and Women he could have at his beck and Call.
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! or
Back to Power of Hypnosis Ch. 01 or
More submissions by getket.