with a lot of hot details! Good luck in the contest!
by
Anonymous10/04/05
Excellent
I loved the story from beginning to end. Especially when a guy shows a woman that just because they say they want it, he can tell her to get lost. Thanks for the excitement.
by
Anonymous10/05/05
Has potential
However, there was much telling and little showing. Also, some repititions (amazing reappeared often) took attention away from the story.
very sexual......
with a lot of hot details! Good luck in the contest!
Excellent
I loved the story from beginning to end. Especially when a guy shows a woman that just because they say they want it, he can tell her to get lost. Thanks for the excitement.
Has potential
However, there was much telling and little showing. Also, some repititions (amazing reappeared often) took attention away from the story.
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